A week of waking to pale grey skies which offer only
the dreariness of dishcloths, and hinting at November, except it is not cold
and the lush greenness of full-leaved trees is incongruous. That not the reason, but despite a couple of
days usefully drawing flow charts I’ve made no progress with ‘Snap’ and
resorted again (and happily) to editing ‘Drink with a dead man’ – all but done
and awaiting the attentions of one of my beta readers.
This weeks’ winners
arrived at with a little less trauma too: David’s ‘The Generation
Game’ takes top spot for providing a novel quantity of remarkable story in just
100 words, and very different but equally as entertaining, Terrie’s 'The
Secret Armadillo Soldier (SAS) Diaries - entry 110' scampers up in second place.
Words
for next week: interfere kitten profile
Entries
by midnight Thursday 25th June , words and winners posted Friday 26th
Usual rules: 100 words maximum (excluding
title) of flash fiction or poetry using all of the three words above in the
genres of horror, fantasy, science fiction or noir. Serialised fiction is, as
always, welcome. All variants and uses of the words and stems are fine. Feel
free to post links to your stories on Twitter or Facebook or whichever.
congratulations David and Terri, after adding my comments in the week, and reading the stories, it was clear to me who the winners would be! David's story was exceptional. I keep coming up with vague outlines for stand alones, then I look at the competition and think, no way will that stand up to the rest of you!
ReplyDeleteFor your amusement, Shaun and I decided an illuminated notice board wou8ld be good to remind people about sanitising, etc. so we ordered one from Amazon. It arrived and it lit up and the remote turned it on and off but we couldn't write on it! Lots of curses, head scratching, re-reading the piece of paper which told us nothing... in the end Shaun looked up the order on his phone and saw someone drawing on the board with a colourful fat pen. That had not been included with the packaging... and it has just struck me that it might not be part of the deal, as the bubble pack and cardboard packaging was so slim, so tight around the board we had a job to get it out. No room for a pen. Now... did the crafty bunch expect you buy that separately???? We will find out...and I'll let you know... oh the joys of running a shop with Shaun... (LOL)
Nicely done, guys. The competition sure does get challenging around here. Helps us to aspire to greater things. Congratulations, David and Terrie.
ReplyDeleteViva La Vida
ReplyDeleteThey emerge, blind as newborn kittens and equally as vulnerable. We're not allowed to interfere with their progress. An essential element of their acceptance profile is the ability for independent survival.
A great story in a small package, awesome opening submission. Pitty my story for following it.
DeleteDavid and Terrie, congrats. Quality stories are visible for miles.
DeleteYour eloquent brevity is enviable Patricia. So much in so few words.
Deletesays everything condensed into nothing more than a handful of very precise, very vivid words. Clever writing.
DeleteSuch an obvious statement, but you've also caught the depth of consequences. Concisely.
DeleteReally nice wordsmithing. Blind and vulnerable, but capable of unassisted survival... I'm glad this is fiction.
DeleteTo David and Terrie: Way to go!
ReplyDeleteA Broken Rule
ReplyDeleteWhat happened to us over the years? Your profile was spot on-a kitten, playful and happy. I thought you had changed; I remembered the fine print; unit complies with all three laws. You never interfered; those laws prevented it. You cared for us when sick. Made us smile and laugh, never raising your voice. Those rules.
We need to talk. I enter your den, you put the pen down.
“What’s up dear?” You smile. “Do you need anything?”
Those damn rules!
My eyes tear up as I see what you’d written.
I Love You.
That’s not one of them!
I really like this Jeffrey. So many clever little nuances creates a compact story.
DeleteThe rules of robotics I presume. Very clever, Jeffrey. A relationship with a robot would have its challenges.
DeleteYes, it would seem this has much to do with a robotic relationship but very nicely put into words and with a lovely touch of subtlety.
DeleteIf The Shoe Fits...
ReplyDeleteThe minute I spotted them in the window, I knew they fit the profile. Matched the colour of my new dance outfit perfectly and such adorable little bows.
The salesperson tried to interfere with my choice. Brought out strappy sandals, open-toe slingbacks, Mary Janes...until the floor was littered with discarded shoe boxes, but I refused to be dissuaded.
Only trouble is, every time I click those kitten heels together, I end up in Kansas.
What a nice twist on that movie.
DeleteI really like your clever little windows into stories that start as one thing then, with a brilliant twist, transforms into something entirely different altogether. I'm hooked as usual.
Deleteclever twist, tight writing, lovely ending...
DeleteTight writing indeed, and glad to see kitten heels.
DeleteI've not heard of kitten heels, but I like the way you used it. I'd hate to see the price for these slippers. There's no place like home.
DeleteFormal ID
ReplyDeleteShattered.
Her face.
His memories.
As, were they to see it, would be the memories of the countless men who, at the point of orgasm, had gazed into those kitten blue eyes anxious as to how she rated their performance.
Despite the fact the majority had paid for her.
(It used to sadden her such concerns interfered with their pleasure.)
He’d never paid.
They never would again.
The accident, the airbag, the distortion of bones slammed against the car’s interior, the forever-flattened snub-nosed profile, the disintegrated, pleasure-giving fingers, (the rest of her mercifully be-sheeted) laid on a shiny mortuary slab.
Interesting, I could envision them talking about her in such a manner during the autopsy. A good stand alone, Sandra.
Deletewhoo, Sandra, there's nasty if ever there was! And you think you don't write horror???
DeleteIt's interesting the men were concerned about their performance, despite being paying customers. Such fickle beings, men. Besides the accident, it saddened me that even if she found the right person, her past would forever haunt their chances. Be-sheeted... brilliant.
DeleteA wonderful entry, Sandra! The last paragraph exudes brilliant writing!
DeleteThis image doubtless calls for a closed casket. This from the point of view of one who seems to have truly loved the victim is very poignant.
DeleteWhite Cat – White Heat
ReplyDeleteHe’d kept a low profile for over fifty years.
Back in the heady era of the white heat of technology there had been generous public funds and little government interference.
As a consequence he may have successfully sent a small white kitten hurtling into the future.
But the Philistines came. Projects shelved, machinery dismantled. His reports archived, subject to the Official Secrets Act.
He waits on Hampstead Heath. Weary old heart slowly sinking. Time ticks by. He sighs in acceptance of his failure. As he turns to leave a joyous sound seems to fill his entire universe.
“Meow.”
i love time travel and this is well done.
DeleteA bit cautious here ... is this really a happy ending? Or have you some nasty sequel up your sleeve?
Deletethrowing caution to the wind, bold me, saying what a lovely ending and hoping you don't come up with something nasty to drown the niceness...
DeleteA sad story at times and then hope emerges. Well done, David.
DeleteFrom bleak to hopeful? I'd like to think so. I loved the line: Weary old heart slowly sinking. Well done, David!
DeleteThough not particularly stated, it appears that the kitten may have returned without going through an aging process...unlike our protagonist. I love that the point of return was Hampstead Heath, which can be a desolate location and yet, in this instance, is one of gratification. Makes me think of the phrase: "Now I can die happy."
DeleteThe Secret Armadillo Soldier (SAS) Diaries - entry 111
ReplyDeleteTosca rubbed his snout with a kittenish movement, ‘gotta find the Varks an’ Pangolins. Feck knows where they are. Can’t trust em to do anyfink they should.’
‘Hate to interfere, Sir’ Armi’s small companion said quietly, but we must find better cover and rest up. Send scouts. The Varks can’t be far, they’re a noisy bunch, never keep a low profile, someone could find em before us. Don’t wanna lose the element of surprise, Sir.’
‘The gals rite,’ agreed Tosca they’re bluddy loud, an’ a mite fond of cactus-gin and beetle-blood wine.
Everyone agreed finding their rowdy allies was vital.
Rowdy allies, good writing, and nice use of the prompts.
DeleteI'm not up for trying beetle-blood wine, Terrie, and I might bypass the cactus-gin too. The rest of the instalment resonates as perfect Dillo thinking...
DeleteLove that opening gesture! And the clarity of the dialogue.
DeleteI like the concept of these obnoxious aardvarks being allies. Should make great additions to the story.
DeleteThis will be some confrontation when these groups encounter each other. Wonderful presentation through dialog, Terrie!
DeleteWhat an imagination to conjure "cactus-gin" and "beetle-blood wine." Both so in keeping with the theme of this delightful serialization.
DeleteCripplegate Junction/Part 236 - Memoirs: Poppy And Marmalade
ReplyDeleteFew knew Poppy had once hidden a basketful of kittens at her Turnstile Kiosk. Ancient history now, but Poppy remembered when those little innocents had been snatched away and disappeared forever.
Though lacking positive proof, profile of that thief in the night left no doubt in Poppy's mind as to identity. A despicable ailurophobe whose greatest achievement was waitressing at the Junction's cafeteria.
Divine interference had enabled Poppy to save one...but only one...of the litter. That being a tiny orange fluffball.
Poppy watched her sister Violet enter the Crossing Canteen.
Barring unforeseen circumstances, she would never come out again.
--------------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/cripplegate.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
----------------------------------------------------------
Being sisters notwithstanding, some atrocities are beyond forgiveness. Bad blood between siblings can be particularly bad.
Deletea high level of nastiness and sibling rivalry here, beautifully portrayed and adding to the mysteries of this strange junction.
DeleteSomehow (and not that it was previously lacking) this feels like a ramping up of the story into something a good deal less lighthearted. Excellent!
DeleteI think Sandra hit it on the head. A distinct ramp-up in tension and nastiness. I won't ask what put you in this mood...
DeleteBut I like it...
DeleteA surprise incident and I'm wondering just how it will happen. For me, one of the best CJ stories, Patricia.
ReplyDeleteI’m Back- 5
ReplyDelete“Detective Gridley?”
The man was engrossed reading a thick file. He looked up as he added another smoked butt into a kitten shaped ashtray.
“Yeah.”
“I’m Grant Sanders. I performed the autopsy on those stabbing victims. The problem is that profile doesn’t fit.”
“Let me understand here. You interfered with my perfectly good day of doing the Captains work, to tell me that two low-life thugs, who added to the gene pool by removing themselves from it, weren’t stabbed? Okay Sherlock, how then?”
“They were electrocuted. They looked like stab wounds but, the skin showed conclusive evidence of electrical burning.”
Autopsies have a way of piercing holes in well-meaning detective work. Good job showing the annoyance of the detective being second guessed.
DeleteInteresting that stab wounds can take on the guise of many a varied form of injury. I like the idea of a kitten shaped ashtray.
DeleteFeline Fantasies
ReplyDeleteThe free kitten examined the shredded drapes. No since even attempting a low profile on this one. He sauntered past his custom kitty-bed and enclosed litter box, ignoring the multitude of toys littering the newly frayed carpet. He scoffed at the multi-tiered scratching post and sharpened his little claws on the couch. When his owner called him, he ignored her and continued to pee in her slipper.
Later, the free kitten’s owner cried over the latest vet bill and a mangled hairball on her pillow. Meanwhile, he feigned blissful sleep. The free kitten wasn’t one to interfere.
How wonderfully well you describe this pompous, snot-nose of a kitty, John!
Deletegood job my two understand English and their place in the household... this is horrendous in the best possible way!
DeleteHe must be a Siamese kitten, such a well done attitude, John.
DeleteI'm fearful as to what happens when kitten grows up - and just what size he'll be.
DeleteI have found out more than once that there is no such thing as a "free" pet...be it cat or dog. Each comes with its own form of price. Still, the image of this little demon creating such devastation is a sheer delight, especially given that he manages to escape punishment...or so it would seem for the time being anyway.
Deletemore later, this as been in my head since I saw the prompt words...
ReplyDeleteIt’s there, waiting, waiting, I can just see the profile. It’s waiting, I know it is. There’s a problem, someone wants to interfere. I’ve got my plans, they’re good, a lifetime of experience has gone into them, no one should get on the way, no one! Where have they gone, the watchers? Don’t they like seeing me tear it to pieces and throw the bits to the wind? Come on, it’s what I do!
One last look round…
And the kitten made a mad dash for the paper ball…
Whoa! Where did that last line come from? This is good stuff, Antonia!
DeleteA well done, light story, describing chaos, in a whimsical way.
DeleteA tightening and a tightening of the tension ... then a highly dislocating drop.
DeletePlans have a way of getting waylayed (not sure how to spell that, if it's a word). Very entertaining piece, Antonia.
DeleteOn this was good. Very good. I'm glad it made it from your mind onto a screen where we could all enjoy the vision.
DeleteGO FIGURE
ReplyDeleteIt was late, but I wanted to finish the story I was working on.
From behind, a cough. I whirled to see a shadowy figure in profile. “Sorry to interfere,” said a familiar voice.
“Who are you?” I asked tentatively.
The figure turned full-face.
Fear made a highway of my spine. The figure was me. Not just a look-alike, but ME!
“Yes, I am you.” whispered the figure.
“This can’t be!”
I then heard the kitten-like purr of my wife’s voice from down the hall. “Honey, I’m waiting for you.”
The figure laughed and said, “Which of us should go?”
I love the mysterious set ups you create, Jim, they're eerie and fascinating!
DeleteWhat a slew of possibilities you've created.
Delete"Fear made a highway of my spine" - a line I wish I'd thought of - and just one in a heart-stopping whole which took my breath away.
DeleteWhat a great concept for a story. I'd love to read a longer version of this. Can one be jealous of ones-self?
DeleteAnd how does one make such a decision? Wonderful concept. I hope this is just the start of something more. Nice innovative use of "kitten" I might add. Set the scene very nicely.
DeleteChange of focus [382]
ReplyDeleteFrom nowhere, and for no good reason, an image of a snow-white kitten ¬– curious, enquiring – reaching to dab a tentative paw into a scarlet puddle, flooded into Pettinger’s horrified mind. Fastidious, it flicked away droplets adhering to claws, before licking itself to cleanliness.
Bizarrely, kitten then morphed to a childhood Stepcart; an innocent Philly, before man’s gross wickedness interfered.
Outwardly, she’d survived. Just as convincing in appearance as those who had not. (An oft-repeated warning not all newly-qualified civilian profilers heeded.)
No more than she’d heeded his vow of retribution.
Chin tilted. ‘No need, policeman. I can look after myself.‘
Did Pettinger have a premonition? I ealy liked this, though how Pettinger knew what an innocent Stepcart looked like vs. the non-innocent version.. a halo vs. devil ears? A very good sontinuation.
DeletePettinger sure falls for unique women, that's for sure. Nice one, Sandra.
DeleteThis presented quite an intuitive side to Pettiner's character. I am not surprised though. The man has many facets. The "white kitten" scene is fascinating.
DeleteOh yes, such a wealth of images here, just enough to tantalise and get us keen to read instalment 383
ReplyDeleteStop The Week; I Want To Get Off (103)
ReplyDeleteThere’s no need to interfere with the way fate runs the shop and keeps it interesting, the South African table was bought by a South African lady… who had been looking for one like it for a year… She sounded kittenish on the phone but was business-like and efficient when in the shop. No proper profile yet, no indication it’s safe to open, charity shops are still closed, we are following suit, just in case there’s a law we don’t know about. Nothing much has changed, few items sold, nothing has moved…I am ever hopeful it will happen soon!
Hope springs eternal, might be cliche' but you and Shaun, exemplify it.
DeleteLove the idea of fate running the shop.
DeleteJust another week in our Covid influenced lives. Well portrayed here. Are there Walmarts in the UK? It's funny how they are allowed to thrive, selling everything while other retailers suffer.
DeleteThings do seem to have stagnated in terms of improvement. Here in Oregon at least, the covid case figures are rising. One or two counties have applied for Phase Three openings...not sure what that entails. I have a feeling we might be stuck in this limbo for a while. It definitely sounds as though your delightful shop will weather the storm though.
DeleteThe Joys of Mediumship 10
ReplyDeleteProfile a medium, flowing clothes, shawl, black nail, black cat… not me! Those who come as quiet as a kitten pads across a carpet don’t worry how we look or think, as long as we’re there and don’t interfere with the message. This week I had all those trapped in the Grenfell Tower tragedy sending cold waves through me as I added them to the Victims book, along with George Floyd, who came sooner than I hoped. He left a deep and moving message for the world. Don’t judge him by his past. This is a great soul.
A medium who dresses for the public, isn't a medium. Conveying those messages is your gift and you do it very well.
DeleteIt's always interesting for me to read these. You often sprinkle in little references as to your method that I find intriguing.
DeleteWhat interesting...and sometimes tragic...characters do seek you out to tell their story, Antonia. And I'm sure each has an intriguing tale to tell.
DeleteCuriouser and curiouser [Threshold 305]
ReplyDeleteThe suddenness with which I sat disrupted his perusal of my back. Whatever he hoped to learn – name, birthplace or glowing personal profile as scribed by some goddess of wayward daughters – he’d’ve been better listening to my words, reading my face, for the hurt which, time after time, he dealt me, and working out why.
‘You didn’t send –?’
‘No. I –‘ Something uncomfortable interfered with his attempt to recollect. ‘I thought –¬ I was told – you’d gone on ahead –’
It was you, me, and a single tree, in the middle of an empty desert! Who? Who told you?’
‘Kitten.’
And yet more mystery...
DeleteTheir conversation is telling in that reasons for there continual separations are wearing thin.
Not sure if it's my computer or blogger or both but that comment came out mangled... so...
Deletethere's a good deal going on in this instalment, declaration by stance, by word and be demand in the peremptory Who? and the one word response which leaves it wide open for the next part...
"Who" is probably the most intriguing question there is. To me, it demands to be answered even more than "where" or even "why." Certain lines of this installment echo poetically.
DeleteI've my ideas of who 'Kitten' is and the potential cat-fight might not be as interesting as it sounds.
ReplyDeleteKursaal (Episode Two Hundred Seven) - "Nota Cattus"
ReplyDeleteNellie Hubbard, proprietress of the less-than-successful Playpen (where toddlers might be safely deposited while thrill-seeking caregivers went in search of excitement) was a rara avis even among the Kursaal's cast of oddities.
Perhaps her witchlike profile...pointy chin, warty nose and all...set her apart. But she did have one constant and loyal companion, a one-eyed black cat named Occulus that Nellie adopted as a kitten. Occulus was fiercely protective of his mistress and brooked no interference into Nellie's eccentric behaviour.
The cat was occasionally in possession of the Obfuscation Orb, his singular ice-blue eye staring knowingly into its depths.
--------------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale, please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/kursaal.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------
NOTE: Nellie Hubbard and Occulus (her cat), as well as the Obfuscation Orb, have all featured in previous episodes.
Not sure I'd leave my offspring there, no matter how tempting the other thrills.
DeleteYes, Nellie is who I'd leave my children with.
DeleteThere's something ominous about a one-eyed cat.
Oculus is a great name and do we have a rival for Marmalade?
Deletethe whole concept is worrying, just how much mischief could Nellie concoct on her own and how much more could be created if she and Occulus really got busy...
ReplyDelete