A weekend with crime writers –
brilliant workshops, bizarre conversations and friendly advice and
encouragement from all – followed by reading one of Douglas Lindsay’s DS Hutton
novels, which I described as ‘human, amusing and gruesome’ and then to return to
this week’s many superlative offerings here, it seems obvious that John’s
‘Weekday Special’ merits top place, with Jim a close second with ‘And
the verdict is….’
Thank you all for entries, comments,
patience and votes.
Words
for next week: sandwich turbulent violet
Entries
by midnight (GMT) Thursday 5th March,
words and winners posted Friday 6th
Usual rules: 100 words maximum (excluding
title) of flash fiction or poetry using all of the three words above in the
genres of horror, fantasy, science fiction or noir. Serialised fiction is, as
always, welcome. All variants and uses of the words and stems are fine. Feel
free to post links to your stories on Twitter or Facebook or whichever social
media you prefer.
The Reluctant Hussy
ReplyDeleteDetective William Kitz approached Misty as she sat on a park bench feeding a turbulent horde of pigeons. She wore oversize dollar-store sunglasses that didn’t cover the violet bruising around both eyes.
“Can I have a word, miss?”
“Take all you want, they’re free.”
Suppressing a smile, he handed her a photograph. “Do you recognize the tall man eating a sandwich?”
“He’s Mr. Boxby.”
“Do you know what happened to him?”
She nodded.
“I’m afraid I’m going to have to arrest you.”
Misty rose. “You didn’t happen to get my shoe back did you? My feet are killing me.”
Misty's sense of humor tells me she is okay with the damage she did to Mr. Bobby. Good for her! Your last week's entry most certainly deserved the top spot, John.
DeleteI love that last line, I snorted my morning coffee out through both nostrils.
DeleteCongrats John for his top finish and Jim for his second place this week and garnering three votes for the week before and winning that week. Excellent stories all around, gentlemen.
DeleteSuch nonchalance from her, makes me think this was her plan all along.
DeleteI do like the dark humour in this John, and the tight dialogue really moves the story along.
DeleteI know this isn't a critique forum, yet I'm asking for any who desire to provide a rating for my stories, only as they relate to my previous stories and how you enjoyed or didn't enjoy the story. What system you chose is up to you. If you'd like I could provide my e-mail if you like to make any comments that way. I ask this as a personal favor due to my opinion of the weakness and faults in my writing.
DeleteLove it! Asking for the shoe back. Ye gods, I'm beginning to adore that girl.
Deletecongrats, John and Jim, you're the shining stars, both of you!
Deletedark and oddly enchanting, Misty is one fine heroine, the kind of person I could like!!
DeleteThe Reluctant Hussy
ReplyDeleteThe prosecutor paced. “You’re saying Mr. Boxby was already dead when you inserted your shoe in his rectum?”
“Yes sir,” Misty said, sandwiched in an inappropriate violet pushup bra.
“And you say you didn’t kill him?”
“Not exactly.”
“Please, enlighten us.”
“He shook his weenie and insisted on seeing my boobies. I said no. He hit me, several times, and I showed him.”
“And then what?”
“He keeled over.”
“From seeing your breasts?”
Misty shrugged.
“Your honor, I propose that the defendant produce her breasts as evidence.”
The judge gaveled. “The court will recess one hour while I consider this turbulent request.”
Quite wicked, John. I wonder, do you compose these whilst in public places?
DeleteNo public writing for me. I don't know if you've noticed, but sometimes I delve into risque situations in my stories. Wouldn't want some kid reading over my shoulder. Of course, I could tone it down an bit, but what fun would that be?
DeleteI had a vision of you sitting on a train, giggling uncontrollably to yourself. Obviously wrong. (You might not have been giggling)
DeleteInstead, I'll congratulate you on these two pieces of highly entertaining writing.
Oh no! Misty is a Fembot! Two very good continuations, John.
DeleteStill chuckling from the first reluctant hussy section this week and Misty goes on to keep the chuckles coming. Your dialogue creates great visual imagery and I am starting to like Misty although im not sure it’s wise given her treatment of a corpse.
DeleteHmm...wonder if the Judge is considering or fantasizing. Interesting proposition. Am I wrong for wanting Misty to get off Scott-free?
Deletejoining you there, Patricia, definitely she should be let off!!
DeleteSnap: Theo contemplates interrogation
ReplyDeleteThree o’clock and already the Lothian sky that shade of violet which, if he was being fanciful, could be read as harbinger of an evening in which sex would be sandwich filler for dine and wine.
With luck (and stamina!) a second helping served as supper.
Question was, which would best persuade her to talk?
To soften her – loose her tongue. Alcohol? Or threat? He needed her to talk. Knew fine well if it came to threats it’d end this sweet, sweet interlude but, more certainly, without her information, and these being turbulent times, his life would get less comfortable.
I'd go with the alcohol. Wouldn't want to jeopardize the two-a-dayers. I liked how you repeated 'sweet' when describing the interlude. Very effective.
DeleteI really don't think there's any choice here. Alcohol all the way. Threats can go terribly wrong when directed at the wrong woman.
Deleteyes, alcohol it should be, but why not be different... there are many ways of getting what you want...
DeleteA historical diversion
ReplyDelete‘Becket. He kept saying Becket. All the while I was eating my sandwiches, he just –‘
‘What sort of sandwiches, Miss Canterbury?’
‘What sort? Cheese, as it happens, With cucumber and Marmite. though the cucumber kept slipping out. What’s the significance of that?’
‘Miss Canterbury, ‘I’m more concerned with why you thought –‘
‘And it’s Violet! My name is Violet. Miss Canterbury sounds like my great aunt. And, also, Canterbury’s where he was killed. In the cathedral’
‘Killed? Who was killed?’
‘Becket, of course. He was Archbishop. Henry ordered they get rid. Called him “That turbulent priest” –‘
‘When?’
‘1170’
An intriguing bit of writing, Sandra. I enjoyed this conversation very much.
DeleteIntriguing historically based piece. When I was at school, the Drama Club put on a performance of "Murder In The Cathedral" and I remember visiting the Cathedral itself on a school trip, but other than that I know little about the man himself.
Deletethis is clever! The Cardinal is one of the spirits I am waiting on, should be interesting to get his view of the murder. Not joking, he has been and talked to me already, about ten years back, still waiting on his visits as Becket and as More, as it happens. He came back as Thomas More to defy another king (unquote)
DeleteVery nicely done, John. What a worthy win. You are becoming a mighty force to be reckoned with!
ReplyDeleteHow Does Your Garden Grow?
ReplyDeleteMiss Contraire arranged cucumber sandwiches, added sugar to lemonade, and waited for arrival of the Judging Committee.
Her garden contained patchwork squares of hybrid blooms named to honor the poor souls with turbulent pasts who had run away from the Village Home for Wayward Girls.
In previous years, Miss Contaire had been awarded the Blue Ribbon for such fine creations as the pale pink "Bridget's Blush" and glorious sunglow of "Helen's Halo." She had a reputation of excellence and originality to maintain and hoped for similar success with a singularly poignant addition.
A velvet-petaled violet pansy she called "Valerie's Vision."
I 5hink Mary might have a clue as to the whereabouts of the missing wayward girls. Perhaps among the patchwork rhey are. Or maybe I'm overly suspicious.
DeleteAs ever, you subtly insert into the reader's brain the suggestions of deeds they'd rather not contemplate. But by the end of just 100 words, they are ensnared, and unable to remove the horrid possibility from their mind.
DeleteFrom a sweet old lady with an award-winning garden to a serial killer of young girls... and in a smooth, seamless transition. This is good stuff, Patricia!
DeleteWhat better way to honor the memories of those poor missing young girls. So far every entry is of excellent caliber.
DeleteNeat allusion to the nursery rhyme Patricia, and like John I have my suspicions that Miss Contraire must be using a special kind of mulch for her garden to grow so well.
DeleteI love this, so smothly done.
Deletealmost innocent but not quite, holding out the promise of more but not giving it, so we are left to make up our minds. This is one fine story, Patricia!
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you'll think of something, William, as these punks have earned retribution. I'm hoping you do in next week's entry.
DeleteSometimes you need to get down in the mud with such people. Nice beginning, William.
DeleteLove your use of prompts here, William, especially 'knuckle sandwich'.
DeleteI too liked knuckle sandwich. I wish I'd thought to use it. It's probably best to back off such a threat to a teen. Would lead to great difficulties.
DeleteOh, I have a feeling your protagonist will come up with a rather satisfactory way to turn the tables. Love your pieces, William. They are always so original.
Deleteyou can almost feel the rage coming off the screen! Vivid writing, William.
DeleteChange of focus [366]
ReplyDeleteFirst hours of a murder investigation are full-on turbulent activity as the crime site (including body) is scoured for evidence. Much had been done in darkness but now awaited daylight. The near-bloodless teenage body had reached the bright-lit mortuary, merciless white above him, ultra-violet in the shadows. Had been examined, undressed, clothes (including daisy-painted Docs) bagged and tagged, and hairless and nameless youth heart-breakingly revealed, perfect but for a scarlet hole in his neck.
Pettinger directed: ‘Key from his neck is key’ before returning home to find Aleks fast asleep headphones still in place and half-eaten sandwich on the floor.
What a great trip from the crime scene to the mortuary. Loved ultra-violet and how it fit so well with the scene. Good to see Aleks safe and sound.
DeleteI love how this suggests the untold story of Pettingers preoccupation with his concern for Aleks, the pain of a parent in the job he must do.
DeleteI have to agree with John and Jim, here. Magnificent description of the state of the deceased's body. Graphic, but still executed with a nice touch of class.
Deleteyou've learned a lot from your writing weekends, Sandra, this is vivid pathology stuff that works really well.
DeleteYour description of the body is marvelous, Sandra. 'bloodless... merciless white... hairless and nameless... such great use of descriptive language.
ReplyDeleteModus Operandi
ReplyDeleteSerial killers invariably follow specific methods. Some reflect turbulent characteristics. Others are more controlled. Either way, it's a signature scenario. Repetition in its most nefarious form. Homicide is trained to note these calculated idiosyncrasies. In this instance, childlike scrawl of obscene messages in purple crayon on the wall above the victim.
It's a great stress-reliever to play with my daughter when I get home, even if only for a short time sandwiched between bath and bed.
She like me to colour with her and never minds when Mommy borrows the Vivid Violet from her box of Crayolas.
Again.
The best place to hide can be right in the open. Another well crafted story, Patricia.
DeleteSmooth as some purple cocktail, and a lot more satisfying.
Delete"She like me to colour" should, of course, read "She likes me to colour. DUH...!!!
Deletenot your stereotypical serial killer. I like how she treats murder as her stressful job and arrives home to play with her daughter.
DeleteA risky business using her daughters crayons, as we know kids toys and belongs are a cesspool of DNA, I wonder if thats how she'll eventually get caught? Chilling!
Deleteloads of potential here, but it probably won't move on... except in my memory. Vivid images!
DeleteSandwich, Turbulent, violet
ReplyDeleteA New Tradition
John Montagu was listening to the finalists read their stories.
My wife encouraged me to modify Sir Edward, the first Earl of Sandwich contest. From its turbulent partying, to one of literacy. Finally, the last of them. He’s wearing violet contacts, long silver wig, and forester outfit. An interesting rendition of William Tell. He nailed the apple of his eye and not the apple on his head. He doesn’t get what it takes to win, even after twenty years. Caroline says I should award him a prize for determination, and I agree but, for proving Franklin’s theory on insanity.
I haven't heard of Franklin's theory of insanity. Perhaps you made it up and there isn't one. I liked Earl of Sandwich; a good way to use that prompt.
DeleteFYI John, "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results." (Benjamin Franklin)
DeleteNice one, Jeffrey. Interesting format.
DeleteI think that Benjamin Franklin theory should be applied to most governments... interesting one, Jeffrey.
DeleteSandwich, turbulent, violet
ReplyDeleteA Dream Message
They entered the Pope's chambers, sandwiched between the guards.
“Leave us.”
Father Vincenzo and Cardinal Albornoz saw His holiness, Innocent the VI Vicar of Christ on Earth, wearing his violet sleeping smock and on his knees in front of a crucifix of Jesus, praying. He looked up as the doors closed.
“I had the most turbulent of dreams. Daniel came to me, Etienne, saying I would have three visions, for the three days Christ was entombed, before he rose, to show that even death can be conquered.”
Albornoz said, “Did you have these visions, Your Holiness?”
“Yes, I did.”
I liked this Jeffrey. I got a strong sense of historical setting but with a hint of otherworldliness. And as ever you are so good at letting the dialogue do all the work.
DeleteI agree with Terrie on the historical setting. I'm glad I'm not the Pope; dreaming about visions of Christs's entombment. But I'd make a terrible Pope anyway. Good story, Jeffrey.
DeleteA very atmospheric piece and I can’t wait to hear more
DeleteNice historical setting with some well-built dialogue. I agree with William in that this definitely needs to be continued.
DeleteThe Secret Armadillo Soldier (SAS) Diaries - entry 85
ReplyDeleteGlancing at the turbulent violet-hued sky Cinereus sniffed, ‘Storm’s coming… find cover quick’.
‘There’s a place ahead,’ Tosca chirped, ‘found it years ago… safe and dry.’ He scurried away.
Cinereus limped after him.
Nigel helped heft the unconscious gerbil onto the contraption. They sandwiched him between two thick struts. ‘Follow ‘em soldiers, fast as yu’ can,’ he barked.
As they ran the wind rose and whipped vegetation in all directions. Hard rain stung their scales and Cinereus suddenly looked half his size as the torrent soaked through his fur.
‘Here,’ Tosca said.
Leaving his camouflage, he squeezed into the undergrowth.
How well-observed, Cinereus looking half his size!
DeleteBeautiful opening line, very visual and a nice blend of dialogue and narration.
DeleteWhen I read these stories, I sometimes ask myself where this setting is. Take Peter Rabbit: all the stories take place either in Mr. McGregor's garden or the woods close to Peter's home. I conclude this story takes place in a large meadow somewhere, the cast of characters reined to a finite space, unaware of what goes on in other meadows. A really interesting concept.
DeleteI had typed Refined but reined ended up working too.
DeleteI loved “ Hard rain stung their scales“ it made stop and ponder.
DeleteLovely sense of urgency here and, of course, the visuals take center stage as always. I want to comment on John's observations. To be honest, I hadn't considered this aspect of the SAS Diaries, but would love to investigate further.
DeleteThe Secret Armadillo Soldier (SAS) Diaries - entry 86
ReplyDeleteBrenda inspected Armi’s belly, prodding at the violet bruising gently.
He winced.
‘Not quite fixed,’ she said, ‘few more days should do it, but no gallivantin’ off doing yer soldierin’ Mr. Armi, it’ll open the whole thing up agin’.’
Pink Fairy nosed into the burrow and, sandwiching himself between Armi and Brenda, said, ‘She’s right yu’ know. An’ the drought’s done. A storm’s raging up top, yu won’t be able to go anywhere in this turbulence.’
‘S’ rite Mr Armi. It’s a doozie too.’
Armi sighed. He was restless and had a mission to complete.
So glad you included purple bruising - I wanted to but didn't manage, and what a lovely, tight-wrapped intimate scene you've built here.
DeleteAnother story with your penchant for well done scene setting.
DeleteThis burrow seems so cozy and inviting, despite the storm raging above. I liked how they refer to the outside world as on top.
DeleteAfter weeks of being stuck indoors myself, I can feel Armi’s desire to get out and about. A really well written piece.
DeleteLike the subtle reference to the previous episode...the raging storm. Poor Armi. He's obviously raring to go and missing the action.
Deleteit's good you can write two instalments in a week, one is never enough!
DeleteThe Ties That Bind
ReplyDeleteHis bed shook like a raft on a turbulent river.
A voice screeched. “Jason, what do you want in your sandwich?”
He groaned. “Violet! Could you please just stop?”
The room echoed to her reply. “I am your mother. Don’t you dare call me Violet!”
He sat up and stared into the gloom.
“You died twenty years ago. Let me go. You’ve destroyed every relationship I ever had.”
Invisible hands yanked open the curtains.
“Get up! You’ll be late!”
The apron strings tightened like a noose around his neck.
“I hate you,” he spat.
The disembodied slap sent him reeling.
Horrendous, ever-rising sense of nightmare. One that continues to resonate.
DeleteThis lends a whole new meaning to the phrase A Momma's Boy. I liked and enjoyed your story very much.
DeleteIt would be hard to have a relationship with someone being abused by his dead mother. Very nice, David.
DeleteJason needs to place a call to Ghostbusters. I'm surprised he still has his mental faculties... or does he? Very nice, David!
Deletea nicely haunting piece.
DeleteOooh, yes. Haunting indeed. A have no talent for creating ghost-type stories. To me, however, this was more rather reminiscent of Psycho...and it don't get better than that.
Deletetight writing depicting a true horror scenario. Great story, David!
DeleteThe Secret Armadillo Soldier (SAS) Diaries - entry 87
ReplyDeleteSandwiched between a pile of rotten reedy-scrolls and mouldering tomes streaked with livid violet fungus, Atlas listened to the turbulent storm as it raged overhead. He did not like this forced stop or the fact that he was in a place he knew little about.
A strong smell of decay started to filter about him as he watched the water trickle away between the books and that itchy feeling of wariness began to prickle at his snout.
He shrank back into the shadowy-darkness as the sound of scratching came from behind the rotting books.
The stinking smell swelled unbearably.
Cue ominous music ... am loving this series.
DeleteAny port in a storm applies to monsters as well. Well done.
DeleteQuite a contrast in setting from this one to the last one. No cozy burrow here. I'm really intrigued by this overbearing scent.
DeleteAgain, that reference to the storm, which links these pieces into one whole. This, however, comes with an entirely different ambiance. No doubt it takes an abundance of talent to create these subtle descriptions.
Deletethree! A wealth of riches again this week!!
DeleteGathering magic 5
ReplyDeleteFrom the beginning, Batt, who was old even when magic first appeared, hid, sandwiched between the realms of shadow and light, watching the wizard twist and warp the child’s turbulent thoughts and setting stain on her very soul with his black teaching.
Batt knew the wizard was not her father and he was not surprised when she destroyed him. He’d always known who was stronger.
Batt knew many things, but kept his own counsel. He was not a fool.
He’d seen the violet-cast blaze within the child’s eyes so knew who her mother was too, and he trembled.
Really liked the line, sandwiched between the realms of shadow and light. This is a really good series you have.
DeleteThat final line had me trembling too - such page-turning promise.
DeleteI know I'm a broken record, Terrie, but once again I must say how I love the way you weave your beautiful use of language into your fascinating tales.
DeleteI bet she absorbed a lot of magic after killing the wizard, who likely deserved his fate. What a great place for Batt to lurk, between the realms of shadow and light.
DeleteThis was quite, quite lovely. However, I think my favourite phrase in the whole piece is" "Batt knew many things." What a wealth of mystic and magic is held within those four words.
Deletea world away from the dillos and just as entertaining.
DeleteI so wish I’d written “ and setting stain on her very soul with his black teaching”
DeleteHalted conversation [Threshold 290]
ReplyDeleteI sandwiched maybe exploratory hand between mine, knowing he’d the strength to overcome me. Instinct told me he meant no harm – a rarity in my so-far turbulent life! – and I reached for the discarded bottle, fearful its contents would be spilt and gone forever. Again I simulated washing, tipping a little into my palm. My noticing its lack of clarity coincided with a flash of panic in his violet eyes.
His ‘No!’ clear enough, unlike explanation: ‘Black birdman –‘
‘Raven?’
‘– Says bring only sleeping. No change.’
‘How much further?’
A shrug. He didn’t understand.
Nor did I.
It's telling when she meets someone who she thinks means no harm, and that it's a rarity. Sound's like Raven isn't far away...
DeleteInteresting that our protagonist (who continues to remain nameless) senses that this individual will do her no harm. I like the taunting reference to Raven. Is he close by, I wonder?
Deletetantalising Raven and a whole host of mysterious happenings...
DeleteSandwich, turbulent, violet
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile, back at the Manor House
Malik had settled into being the head of the estate. His time was sandwiched between his new responsibilities and his desire to be at the forge, taking out his turbulent frustrations on a piece of red-hot steel.
His eyes, one violet and the other yellow, along with his pointed ears, displayed his mother’s heritage. Elves weren’t overly popular with humans but his fathers…no his estate was. The invitations from Randolph Duhlack and Stephen Falkenburg to visit and discuss a marriage with an eligible daughter. Even Baron Rathmore had mentioned that he had a niece.
Just takes a little money to get a good wife I guess. Back then anyway. Enjoyable read, Jeffrey.
DeleteElves rule! At least at Malik's estate they do. I feel sorry for whomever is offered to Malik in marriage. A good read, Jeffrey.
DeleteSo, is there likely to be a wedding in the future here? Very interesting visual with one violet and one yellow eye. I've seen blue with green, but this combination must really be disconcerting.
DeleteSandwich, turbulent, violet
ReplyDeleteThe Janus Door III
The turbulent explosion had sandwiched Vibius between a door and a column. His vision was blurred, and his balance off.
"Mars, take no offense. I've seen thirty-eight summers and that's too many for me to put up with this shit." He saw the sun outside and looked at his soldiers, shaking his head.
"Legionnaires, get up! It’s only thunder, lightning, and smoke. Archers by the door, legionnaires next then spearmen to the front. Doctors help with the people. Up and out, or by the Emperors violet robe, you’ll be digging so many ditches, your piss will flow to Parthia!"
I can feel the tension you poured into this, Jeffrey. One can only hope that those under Vibius's command are as brave as he is.
DeleteThirty eight summer? Vibious is practically ancient. At least in ancient Roman times. I wouldn't want to be a spearman in this case, at the front.
DeleteStrong words of encouragement to the legions here. Wonder how they will fare. Best not offend Mars though. I hope the war god takes things kindly.
DeleteAgain great dialogue Jeffrey and a wonderful authentic earthiness to it just as I feel roman centurions, legionnaires and legates would use.
ReplyDeleteCripplegate Junction/Part 223 - View From A Carriage Window/Part One
ReplyDeleteWithin the depths of her carpet bag, the Grande Dame sought and found her enameled canister of Parma Violets sandwiched between her brocade pince-nez holder and engraved silver calling card case.
The tiny pastille dissolved on her tongue as she observed events taking place on the platform beyond her compartment window. A study in turbulence.
Former Crossing Canteen waitress, on hands and knees, sifted through a stream of wilting tea leaves. The Conductor patrolled nervously back and forth, bringing whistle to lips and then down again. And Marmalade, long and low to the ground, stealthed his way along the tracks.
--------------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/cripplegate.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
----------------------------------------------------------
An excellent opening line and your use of narration is second to none.
DeleteI'm having a day of forgetting to press 'Publish' (Did it early morning on another site too.) What I said last time was I think the Grande Dame one of my favourite characters, and much as I'd like to claim I put 'violet' in just to bring her back honesty forbids me.
DeleteAnd you didn't even use Violet's name in the story...
DeleteWhat an interesting bit of menagerie in the Dame's carpet bag, and of course she carries a carpet bag...
There goes Marmalade again.
clever descriptive use of the prompts and my favourite cat... what more could I want?
DeleteSiblings
ReplyDelete"Turbulence," screeched Jeremy, violently rocking his baby sister's bassinet. "Code... Code..."
"Red, idiot," said his older brother.
They shared an ice cream sandwich and watched little Maisie's lips turn bluish-violet, her cheeks ashen and her eyes glaze.
"System failure," said Jeremy.
"Epic," said his brother.
Crikey, Patricia, you really are on a roll this week, aren't you? That final word is absolute perfection.
DeleteWhere the heck is mom? Or dad, to be politically correct. Man, what a pair these two are.
Deleteoh just brilliant, capped by that last line!
DeleteShot in the dark
ReplyDelete“Even on the ceiling?” the petite detective asked.
The hazmatted technician nodded, waving his ultraviolet wand.
“Blood or semen?”
“Both,” said the technician.
Outside, the detective bit into her sandwich, glad she ordered extra mayo. The times were turbulent indeed.
She thought of the inevitable interview with Michael Quinn, the boyfriend… an extraordinarily attractive man. Was he capable of murder? The meeting should prove interesting at the least.
‘The ceiling?’ she mused, fanning her face.
Oh dear ... that final line ... the (enforced) direction of my mind. Skillful writing John.
DeleteWonderful writing John. Allusion and desire in that last line.
DeleteWonderfully suggestive, John! It appears the detective has more in mind than simply questioning the boyfriend.
DeleteYou are the master of suggestion, John. And what a marvellous trait that is.
Deletea subtle suggestion, enough to produce a torrent of images...
DeleteTHE FIRST BITE
ReplyDeleteOur marriage was turbulent; we fought constantly. Who was to blame? Does it matter?
Divorce? Not practical for a number of reasons… mainly financial. Live apart? We both wanted the house.
That left me but one way out.
I made her favorite sandwich, liverwurst and swiss on Jewish rye, and placed it by a vase of violets. She seemed pleased.
Before sitting down, she said , “And I have something special for you… dear.”
Before long she returned with my favorite sandwich - Spam and tomato on pumpernickel.
We sat staring at each other. Who would take the first bite?
Oh, the tension in this! I can see those sandwiches getting very stale ...
DeleteA most enjoyable story and it appears that the enjoyability of the sandwiches is in question.
DeleteThe work of a master, Jim. Well done.
DeleteLove this. I do believe suspicion reigns on both sides here. Methinks those sandwiches might begin to curl at the edges before this confrontation is resolved.
Deletea true stand off, with rapidly degenerating sandwiches, which sounded delicious, demanding their attention and neither of them prepared to take a chance.
DeleteA true Mexican stand off in an excellently told tale.
DeleteKursaal (Episode One Hundred Ninety Six) - "Bowled Over/Final Innings"
ReplyDeleteNot one scrap of smoked salmon sandwich or single crumb of violet and vanilla bean macaron provided by Lottie's Larder remained at the conclusion of the cricket match between the local Constabulary and Kursaal employees.
The game itself had reached a turbulent end with both sides claiming victory. It had even been necessary to restrain Crow the Choleric Clown (and Kursaal opening batsman) from physically assaulting Chief Constable Twittering, the Police Team Captain.
When Twittering was told, in no uncertain terms, "On yer bike!" he would have happily complied but his prized Raleigh 3-speed had mysteriously gone missing.
--------------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale, please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/kursaal.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------
NOTE: Lottie's Larder, Crow the Choleric Clown and Chief Constable Twittering have all featured in previous episodes.
Delightful rural tale ...
DeleteWhenever a Kursaal episode pops up, I metaphorically crack my knuckles and say to myself, let's see what's going on in this joint now. I love these cricket matches. So very entertaining. I once had a 3 speed English Racer, I forget the brand, but very state-of-the-art at the time.
DeleteA very entertaining episode, Patricia. I sens that matches between these teams are always chaotic.
DeleteI've heard that cricket matches are or can be as rowdy as a soccer match. Love the narration and descriptions.
DeleteI can;t tolerate cricket, but then I've not seen a Kursaal one, have I? That wouldn't be boring...
DeleteHaving recently had a birthday I was bought an ice cream maker, and violet and vanilla bean sounds yum. That aside your writing as always delivers such fine images and entertainment.
DeleteInadequately Yours
ReplyDeleteOn our first date I bought you Violets,
not roses that I’d stolen from a grave.
Ok I was awkward, didn’t know how to behave.
I offered to share my sandwich on the park bench where we sat.
You wanted more than someone like me,
at that time I couldn’t provide that.
This turbulent youth grew, trying the best he could do.
Climbing the tower of life, my only thoughts were of you.
I’d swap my fame and fortune and cancel all my tours
If only you would accept me as inadequately yours.
Those last two lines were great. A very entertaining piece. I wonder if the other person is feeling an opportunity lost?
DeleteTalk about a guy carrying a torch! That he was able to gain fame and fortune despite his broken heart is quite commendable, William.
DeleteI do hope there's a continuation to this. I simply must know how the obsession of this lovelorn fellow pans out. As always, poetic submissions in this forum are always such a treat.
DeleteA wonderful poem and an interesting question, is love itself an obsession?
DeleteWilliam, you excelled yourself with this!
DeleteStop The Week; I Want To Get Off (87)
ReplyDeleteOne customer is a sandwich short of a picnic, how can a 40s wedding photo be me… bouquet of violets no less… Another bad week. The storms made people stay home, now it’s the new gas pipe, road closed, five days to get there. The pet shop has threatened legal action if they don’t finish on time, so we’re not alone in our miseries. I changed both windows today, different shelving, everything. Someone bought the scooter top box which I featured, so something might be on the move. Shaun and I are tired of not having any money.
Sorry to hear things have not much improved since last week, Antonia. However, I must say how much I loved the "sandwich short of a picnic" statement. Hang in there. It has to get better.
DeleteSorry to hear you being knocked around and back in so many ways. Hope miney and sunshine arrive soon, and in abundance.
DeleteIt has to be tough row when the road in front of your store is closed. Many possible customers likely elect to pass you by instead of making an extra effort. I hope they finish the gas line soon.
DeleteBlessed are the poor... doesn't cut it these days. I do hope a bonanza of sales will soon occur.
DeleteThat’s a tough situation Antonia, these storms have been a nightmare. We are trying to get our house ready to sell up and move down the coast to Dorset, I believe when all hope is lost, something else comes along.
DeleteAntonia, you and Shaun, are a veritable Rock of Gibraltar. Loved how you changed the scenery(windows) to change the attitude and it worked.All will improve.
DeleteThe Mad Italian (146)
ReplyDeleteTurbulent times as the virus moves on, taking whoever it wishes as it goes. Buy a sandwich, take a germ along with it… Something needs to lift the mood of the world. It is becoming tedious, so much fuss, so much paranoia. Meantime the politicians fight among themselves, is this one guilty of bullying or is it just her way? Can she excel at the task given to her? She is no shrinking violet, and with the PM about to wed and become a father (again) will he be content to leave her to her own brand of politics?
How true, Antonia... the mood of the world is becoming tedious, not to mention depressing. Just a sniff of politics in this country is nauseating.
DeleteDepressing indeed. Is there good news anywhere in the world of late? I get sick of listening to the broadcasts and want to just creep into a comfy cocoon until it all blows over.
DeleteAll this news is bombarding us. Sometimes I want to just tune it all out, but other times I need to know for some reason.
DeleteThese are indeed turbulent times. I had planned my week to ensure I had plenty of time to comment on everyone’s pieces, alas on top of my day job I’ve had to amend business continuity plans for each of my 15 contracts, then a four hour round trip today to one of my teams at the sharp end. Maybe this is a way to make us all shift to contactless payments.
DeleteLoved the unique use of shrinking violet and buy a sandwich, take a germ. A very good episode.
Deletecomments tomorrow, in the hope I can read every entry and not miss out on any of the treats in store... There's my entries for the week, still hoping I can come up with more stand alones, but I have to 'see' the story on paper or in the reply box and that hasn't happened lately. But, my book progresses, it's over the 26,000 word total now and counting!!!!!
ReplyDelete