Good to get back and find the choice
of winner wasn’t totally unanimous. This week, first choice was almost simple: Zaiure’s ‘Therapy’, but I’m
grateful I don’t also have to pick a runner up.
Words
for next week: egregious saliva tail
Entries by
midnight Thursday 31st May, words
posted Friday 1st June
Usual rules: 100 words maximum (excluding title) of flash
fiction or poetry using all of the three words above in the genres of horror,
fantasy, science fiction or noir. Serialised fiction is, as always, welcome.
All variants and use of the words and stems are fine. Feel free to post links
to your stories on Twitter or Facebook or whichever social media you prefer.
Thank you! I'm honored, and glad my piece was enjoyed. :)
ReplyDeleteJeffrey checking in at lunch. Congrats Zaiure on taking top story. A great job by all on last weeks entries.
ReplyDeleteI didn't comment but I did read all last week's entries. Many congratulations, Zauire. As always, your brilliance is so worthy of admiration and top honours. And to everyone else, superb writing.
ReplyDeleteCasey Black, M.H.
ReplyDeleteHe wiped the saliva from his mouth with a flick of his tail and offered me an egregious smile. He pushed the pile of money towards me.
I considered the Lizard carefully. Normally, I didn't like dealing with his kind but sometimes one had to make exceptions. "What makes you think I work with amphibians?"
"Reptile." He hissed, stretching out the r.
"Whatever." I shrugged, irritating him.
"Hoo-mans." He said with disgust.
I sighed. "But you do have me intrigued."
He looked back at me, nervously touching his raincoat.
I glanced at my glass. "Who do you want dead?"
Lizard in a raincoat ..love it ... liked the subtle humour too. I could see the interaction unfolding with each line.
DeleteNicely written and with some humor.
DeleteThis reads like a dirty, grown-up Alice in Wonderland - discombobulating and fascinating.
DeleteThis brings to mind the bar scene in the first Star Wars. I liked how you just put it out there, without preamble, this strange world. I'm curious to find out what the M.H. stands for.
DeleteGreat dialog, RJ! It perfectly sets the reader up for your grand - but unexpected - ending!
DeleteI love the concept of this, so surreal!
DeleteI agree with John as to the Star Wars cantina scene. This was so pictorial. Love the reference to "Hoo-mans." Great use of the prompt words too and that touch of humour was exactly the right amount.
Delete
ReplyDeleteThe Secret Armadillo Soldier (SAS) Diaries - Entry 6 - Pungently Perfumed
Sergeant Screaming-Hairy could stop an elephant with her bellow: so could her perfume. Armi flinched as she bawled at him.
‘You did what? You unfocused, unreliable, treacherous, three-banded little weasel. Rat-bottom gully feeds into the water supply. Everyone’ll be bat-brained-barmy for days.’
Armi quivered at the insult. He was proud of his three-banded heritage.
Screaming –Hairy bawled some more. ‘Lost your rucksack, broke your bloody syringe, replacements cost a tail and claw. Sort it, or face an “egregerious errors” hearing in the clearing.’ Saliva flew as she raged.
Armi eyed her, wistfully.
Hells-hogweed, She’s grand when she’s riled, he thought
Seriously, this is graphic novel material. I love it. I hope you are keeping these installments in a safe place because they are gold.
DeleteStop and elephant with her bellow, good line and installment.
DeleteThis tale grabs more firmly with each succeeding episode - lovely descriptions here.
DeleteWell done, Terri. Loved all the insults and the possible love angle that's brewing.
DeleteWhoops. I meant Terrie.
DeleteHow do you come up with such picturesque language, Terri? Your marvelous choice of words pulled me along as though I were a fish on an angler's line.
Deleteso good, this is going to be one very off the wall book! It is going to be a book, isn't it?
DeleteThis does indeed scream "book." I am growing quite fond of Armi and that "Hells-hogweed" exclamation is so in keeping with the atmosphere.
DeleteI was eight the first time. My sister and I had found a mouse in the garage, trapped in a bottle. We watched as it scrambled to get out, legs a blur, saliva matting its face, tail whirling about. My sister was excited and scared in turns. We decided to kill it, as it was merely a pest. That struck a chord with me. I left her lying on the floor, and set the mouse free. An egregious action? Maybe. It didn’t bother me. As I am unbothered by the killings that followed. What doctors called sociopathic, I called freedom.
ReplyDeleteNice piece, my friend. And welcome to our fun, if not strange at times, little group.
DeleteDavid is a good friend of mine for many moons.
Oooh … David … how chillingly macabre. What a stunning offering.
DeleteGreat piece, comes across as a story with a lot more to be told
DeleteSociopathic and freedom aren't exclusive. An enjoyable story and welcome.
DeleteYikes! Welcome - and what a grisly, horrifying introduction, in such a tiny tale.
DeleteReally nice, David. I love a good sociopath story, especially when told in such a nonchalant way.
Deletegood to have you here, David and even more so after a piece like that! Classic horror. Love it.
DeleteWelcome indeed, David. What an outstanding debut piece. I adore the matter-of-fact delivery, which comes across as something a sociopath could easily create.
DeleteThank you all for your kind words and loving praise. I shall endeavour to hold high the banner and standards of this witty and exciting group!
DeleteI pulled the tufted collar of my jacket up tighter around my face as the spiky wind threatened to freeze my saliva licked lips closed; I was excited, my heart was beating like a stampeding elephant as I tailed her from the bar and out to a cheap motel not far away.
ReplyDeleteWatching as they entered the room before dashing over, my hand clenched painfully tight around my guns handle in preparation.
If I could prevent another death it was my duty, the string of egregious murders all led to her, it was time to end it
Very good prompt use, especially 'tailed'.
DeleteVividly-evoked scenario, and unexpected ending.
DeleteExciting read, Rob. You kept the tension ramped up right through.
DeleteRob, good to see you here.
DeleteThis is good stuff!
This was so nicely constructed and the ending something of a surprise, which is always a bonus. That comparison of a heart beating like a "stampeding elephant" is about a perfect of a description as one can get.
DeleteDevil In The Details
ReplyDeleteAt the risk of sounding cliché, he's my pride and joy. Egregious. Abominable. Monstrous. The one who clearly represents the theological concept of my appearance (inaccurate as such might be). Cloven hooves, goat horns, forked tail. Blah! Blah! Blah!
Part of the problem.
Part of the doubt.
DNA checked via saliva, blood...and other bodily fluids...produce the same results every time. I'm not his father.
Seems even the most exalted of divine angels has trouble being faithful.
This is great flash fiction Patricia. Hooked me and reeled me in. Made me smile with the parting shot too. Thank you.
DeleteOh, superb! Possibly your finest-ever final line.
DeleteI have the feeling Mother will not fair well with this bit of news. Very enjoyable, Patricia.
Deletenice one, Patricia!
DeletePatricia, an enjoyable and very well written story, I loved the Blah! Blah! Blah! So nonchalant.
ReplyDeleteSymposium VI
ReplyDelete“Dr. J, what makes a hero?”
“Hero’s are saliva frothing idiots, who act in the hopes of getting laid, rich or famous.”
“Nothing wrong with self motivation,” said Dr. M.
“The tail wags the dog then,” replied Dr. F.
“Then we’re heroes. Motivation isn’t lacking in any of us, Dr. M”
“Dr. J, we are egregious to the norms of society,” said Dr. F.
“Heroes exist because we exist,” said Dr. J.
“No, talent and opportunity determine who becomes a hero,” said Dr.M.
“That’s why we three, in our own way, are redefining what society should be,” said Dr. F.
Clever use of the prompt words Jeffrey. You have created a great scenario here. I have this 'coffee morning' image of three notorious fictional Drs as they give elegantly reasoned defence for their their behaviour. Brilliant .
DeleteQuite the conversation. The doctors seem to be trapped in their own misguided circle. Nicely done.
Deletedifficult to get into the heads of the positively insane but you did it - well!
DeleteEven if your name had not headed this piece, I would have recognized that unique style a mile away. Welcome back, Jeffrey. Very nice return.
DeleteChange of focus [284]
ReplyDelete‘A public appeal needs careful wording –‘ DI John Pettinger, pinning up post-mortem photographs, found it impossible not to lecture his baby-faced junior officer despite knowing DC Henry Moth would be way ahead.
‘Aye, select the egregious details ¬–’
‘But not so carefully no-one phones –‘
‘’Naked’, ‘tattooed’ and ‘pregnant’ ought to do it. Bring the perverts salivating –‘
‘No use if they didn’t do it, lad.’
‘Nor if they can’t read ...’ Moth’s voice tailed off, then, with ill-concealed glee, ‘Is that a tattoo? Of ... what is it, a ship?’
Informing Pettinger the pathologist couldn’t keep a secret.
These stories are always a delight to read. One would be hard pressed to think of a better name for a junior officer than Henry Moth.
DeleteAn excellent story, Sandra. "Nor if they can't read" is one very good line.
Deleteeven more intriguing.
DeleteOh good. Moth is back in the picture. I've missed those interactions between Pettinger and his ... dare I say, protégé? Week after week, you never fail to find yet another intriguing alleyway to lead us down.
DeleteFalse talk [Threshold 211]
ReplyDeleteSaliva dried. I stared, shocked as much by Raven’s egregious amusement as the thought of this unknown woman – the name ‘Carlotta’ bought to mind a noseless novel-mentioned queen* – relishing the thought of Raven dead and buried in the garden – I presumed by her own hand.
‘Where is she now?‘
Raven’s shrug of nonchalance badly compromised by his wincing at the pain from far-from-full-healed knife cuts. Likewise his uncharacteristic ‘She high-tailed it outta here. Some three years ago.’
Tempted to smack him to common sense, ‘You don’t know where?’
‘No. Should’ve asked my grandmother –‘
‘She knew?’
‘She arranged the marriage.’
*Dorothy Dunnett’s ‘Race of Scorpions’
An arranged marriage always stirs up tension with me and it does well to move this story along nicely. The narrator is very curious about Carlotta and is getting some info bit by bit, though I'm sure not fast enough in her mind.
DeleteEnjoyable and mysterious. I'm intrigued about the current on goings. Good prompt use as well.
Deletetough prompts this week but they are seamless here.
DeleteLove that Raven's grandmother continues to dominate even from beyond the grave. And using "high-tailed" related to one of the prompt words seems to just fit into place so perfectly.
DeleteClose Shave
ReplyDeleteIn hindsight, I realize I shouldn’t have joked around while you were under the effects of the anesthesia. It was egregious of me to shave your pubic area, but the way saliva trickled down your cheek while I worked was incredible. It almost seemed like consent.
Now, I might as well carry a pitch fork and sport a pointed tail. How many times must I apologize?
And it seems you’re right. Clitorises don’t grow back as I thought they would. I googled it.
And I apologise - whilst admiring the skill with which you evoked it - for my snort of laughter at the first paragraph. Especially when the ending was so matter-of-fact horrific.
DeleteTruly, this is horror personified and perfect.
Spot on again, John. A very different yet engaging use of the prompt words into an interesting tale.
DeleteVery good story and I thought my doctors were interesting. Then again, I don't know if this guy is a doctor.
Deletelike this a lot, John!
DeleteOh my goodness, John! Only you could come up with such enjoyable wickedness. You have quite a style, that's for sure!
DeleteCripplegate Junction/Part 144 - Tracking
ReplyDeleteViolet feared and detested felines. Egregious creatures, cunning and inscrutable, whose piteous caterwauling reminded her of abandoned infants.
Upon the Canteen's closure, the former waitress made her way to the Sanitarium. There, she found a small, comfortably-furnished room. It felt like home. Sometimes, tempting bakery aromas tantalized Violet's salivary receptors, but she never located the source.
Darkness brought night terrors. Tiny bundles of fur squirmed and mewled and had to be disposed of, as an orange tabby the colour of Dundee marmalade, with scheming gold-green eyes and luxuriant tail, meandered ever closer along foreboding corridors in search of righteous retribution.
-------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/cripplegate.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------
This reads like an up-ending of the usual method of disposing mice, but to see Marmalade as threat ... that I can understand. Poor Violet.
DeleteGlad to see that Cripplegate is still here and as enjoyable as ever. You have a great opening line. and nice prompt use.
Deleteit's the 'scheming gold-green eyes' that did it for me this week!
DeleteI've got two scary felines, one with scheming green eyes, the other with 'innocent' blue eyes. Neither are honest with me...
Patricia, so many times, your stories are 100 words on the nose. I know, because when I can't believe you said so much in so few words, I check you out. I can picture you cutting and re-reading, then cutting again until you are down to every word being necessary. Nice job once again.
DeleteKursaal (Episode One Hundred Eighteen) - "Risky Business"
ReplyDeleteTo ride the "High Risk Roller" was an egregious (to say nothing of precarious) proposition not recommended for those of a less than robust constitution, which is the reason potential passengers were required to sign a non-liability waiver posted next to the entrance prior to boarding.
The tail section, which reached extraordinary forceful velocity, was particularly hazardous to the health. It often sucked saliva from the mouth and oxygen from the lungs and if a thrillseeker should return to the landing area sans a heartbeat...well, that was why Georgie-Boy Endicott, Kursaal jack-of-all-trades, stood ready with a carefully camouflaged hearse.
---------------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale, please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/kursaal.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------
NOTE: Georgie-Boy Endicott has featured in previous episodes. The "High Risk Roller" is a new Kursaal attraction.
What memories you evoked in my mind! Fortunately few but scary as brown shorts that started out white. I had to read this several times to catch all the prompts. A very well written story.
Deleteit says everything in a very short space and I loved the carefully camouflaged hearse!!
DeleteHmm, 99 words this time. You had room for one more adjective, though it wasn't needed. This was really good. Maybe for a brief period, in my reckless days, I'd have signed the waiver for this ride, but I'll pass.
DeleteThis is a lovely, well-crafted vignette - the camouflaged hearse an especial delight.
DeleteTHE MIRROR
ReplyDeleteGene Maddox approached a man shivering on a park bench. His eyes gleamed sheer terror; saliva bubbled on his lips. “Do you need assistance?” Gene softly offered.
The man stared at the mirror he held. “The face here is not mine!” he cried. “The mirror changed me into someone else!” He thrust the mirror at Gene and, screaming, dashed away.
Hours later, a policeman approached the bench. “Sir,” he said. “Egregious crimes have happened here after dark. Why not head home?”
“Home?” Gene replied, his voice tailing off.
“What’s that you’re holding?” asked the officer.
“A mirror. Have a look.”
A very nice twist in a great story. Excellent job, J.E.
Deleteoh nice twist in this one!
DeleteThis was really well done. I liked that matter-of-fact first sentence and the killer last line.
DeleteClever and disquieting - stays in the mind.
DeleteThat ending line was such a kicker. This complete little package would be right at home in a terror anthology.
DeleteA Midwinter Rendezvous
ReplyDeleteHow I miss igniting your fire,
turning your knobs.
Increasing the heat you radiate,
only makes me salivate.
The Winter Wizard's cursed storms
had you buried at the tail end of the cave
I was unable to breach
the wall of obstacles.
Loves blue flame
makes the juices sizzle
and melts the icy dame
You ask if I feel guilty,
it’s nothing egregious for me to get over.
I’ll get us both cleaned up
before the family gets home.
The song 'Come on Baby Light My Fire' comes to mind. This person seems to have a questionable relationship with a stove... but nonetheless, it was an enjoyable read.
DeleteThis makes me think of an illicit affair between family members. One that must remain hidden from prying eyes. Nicely done, Jeffrey.
DeleteJeffrey here. This poem is a personification style about a gas grill the hsband uses when the family isn’t home on a winters night.
DeleteTHE GLEANING OF DORMAN
ReplyDeleteThe Red Ale Tavern was busy for a Wednesday night. Zoral smiled, mentally tallying his profits; then his egregious losses. Darzak spilled his drink, ale and foam landing on Lethurna and a well dressed merchant.
“Oh, it's Darzak the town fool. Is this your saliva?”
“Fool! Who are you, merchant, to call Darzak, defender of the Thalma bridge and slayer of the vampire Khal-Xath, a fool?”
“I heard the bridge was the one over Shit Creek and Khal-Xath was just a large bat. Stop bragging about the past and keep your red ale from ruining my grilled scorpion tails.”
Sounds like the merchant is no one to mess with... or has he bitten off more than he can chew? It would be interesting to find out which. I enjoyed this well-written tale, Jeffrey.
Deletevery vivid imagery here.
DeleteThis is quite an entertaining conversation. It's likely many of us have ventured up Shit Creek with no means to propel the boat. Very enjoyable story.
DeleteThose imaginative names give this away as one of your trademarks. Nice setting in something of a fantasy world where, it seems, "grilled scorpion tails" are a part of the menu. This world merits expansion.
DeleteMeam Commemorationem
ReplyDeleteSaliva dribbles from the corner of the toothless mouth. Hair wispy and dirty-white upon a skeletal skull. An egregious sight to be sure. Unable to stand. Unable to even sit without losing balance. Tail feathers no longer a reliable rudder.
But...the photograph on the nightstand.
Smile bright as a new-minted florin. Hair the colour of a burnished copper kettle. Captured mid-spin, twirling upon shapely and silk-stockinged legs simply made for dancing. Now shaking those same tail feathers with abandon.
Eyes rheumy and dim barely recognize the image.
But, for an instant, I remember what it is to be young.
Disturbing, and far too close for comfort.
DeleteThis is great. I like how you write the whole thing from no one's POV and then in the last sentence, the narrator takes ownership. really effective.
DeleteThis is marvelous, Patricia! So well-written with a score of wonderfully crafted images!
ReplyDeleteA very beautiful story. Elegance with no regret.
ReplyDeleteoh what sadness and yet what strength! brilliant.
DeleteThe Mad Italian 57.
ReplyDeleteMPs are, on the whole, an egregious group and equally bad is the fact they don’t seem to care. Mention salaries and saliva forms ready to drip. Mention votes and their tails twitch with anticipation of being part of the group, of the whole which will vote on something life changing to which they have not given any consideration whatsoever. One example of this is the ban on fox hunting. On the whole the law is working to preserve the poor animal, and yet the current incumbent hinted at another vote to overturn the law. One wonders why…
The Italian is on fire this week. I'd hate to get on his bad side.
DeleteTails twitching with anticipation is perfect foreshadowing for the fox hunting reference which comes later. I remember signing the petition to ban such barbaric behavior many moons ago. I am on the same page as Leonardo with this...an overturning of the law? Why?
DeleteAn excellent observation, can you hold a vote until you get the result you want? As always, an enjoyable and well written episode.
ReplyDeleteThe Adventures of Rosebud, Pirate Princess #131
ReplyDeleteDinner with Assassins
Diplomacy is overrated, especially in the face of the egregious amounts of spit flowing from this delegate’s idiotic mouth. Cleopatra and I might have to kill him after all. This sort of thing is excusable only in adorable floppy-tailed pups, and even then… well I’ve always been more of a cat person, myself.
Just three sentences, crafted into a whole, full-scale tale, with what looks like egregious ease. Excellent.
DeleteRosie, another well written and most enjoyable episode. Your last line is
ReplyDeleteexcellent.
Wonderfully constructed scenario and, unless I'm much mistaken, the shortest Rosebud Adventure to date. Marvellously imaginative and a beautifully revealing final observation.
ReplyDelete