Sad to say, the rain was not a myth, so it was
especially pleasurable to read all last week’s contributions even if time did
not permit me commenting. Thank you all for your nominations of personal
favourites; it is always reassuring to see how widely they differ, how narrowly
they compare.
This week is no exception so I’m naming three which
especially took my fancy; it goes without saying I could just as easily have picked
a different three, but Patricia’s ‘Gift
Horses’, John’s ‘Acrimonious
measures’ and Rosie’s ‘Our bite’s
worse’ made the current cut.
Words for next week: elevate forensic stir
Entries by midnight Thursday
15th June, words and winners
posted on Friday 16th
Usual rules: 100
words maximum (excluding title) of flash fiction or poetry using all of the
three words above in the genres of horror, fantasy, science fiction or noir.
Serialised fiction is, as always, welcome. All variants and use of the words
and stems are fine. Feel free to post links to your stories on Twitter or
Facebook or whichever social media you prefer.
I'm honored to be included in such talented company. It inspired me to be first out of the box this week.
ReplyDeleteFairness Denied
“Excess fluid in the upper abdomen, elevated white count, blood in the rectum… what do you wanna bet we find cancer in the stomach.” The forensic pathologist lengthened the incision.
“So, she was dying?” the assistant said.
“Probably only a few weeks to live. The pain must have been excruciating.”
“I can imagine.”
“The angle of entry suggests the shooter was at least five feet away.”
“A mercy killing?” the assistant mused. “Probably the husband.”
“Very likely.”
“What do we do?”
“We’re just here to stir the soup, Cedric. The detectives will take care of the dirty work.”
Oddly, not the ending I was expecting. And oddly disturbing altogether, in a twisty wort of way.
DeleteI greartly enjoyed this. My thinking is a 'mercy killing' especially by a husband would've been, pills, suffocation with a pillow, not a gun shot from 5 feet away.
DeleteWell placed prompts and very good flow.
Congrats to the three literary musketeers, Patricia, John and Rosie, for their stories last week!
DeleteNice twist at the end there. I'm sure this type of thing occurs more often than one would think...just not with a gun most of the time. I liked the unusual take on this story. Nicely done.
DeleteI just had another example of why I decided not to have a blog for the shop or for me, Blogger flipped and gave me an 1/8th page view of the site... OK, try again.
DeleteCongrats to Rosie, Patricia and John and kudos to John for this clever twisty story. It's the sort of dialogue that sometimes goes on in Morse, my favourite detective series (boxed set and all) when he wants to take everything seriously and the pathologist is being a little bit flippant. Good one.
Myself and Fairy Godmothers everywhere thank you for this fine honour. I see I am in grand company.
ReplyDeleteThicker Than Water
ReplyDeleteShe never wanted a career in forensic science. Her ambitions were stirred more by the creative arts. Poetry. Dancing. Painting. Still, it was something of a family tradition and who was she to deny her heritage?
Excellent at the job, she was soon elevated beyond field work to analytical investigation within the confines of a laboratory. Ballistics, fingerprint evidence and the like. She much preferred such assignments.
She was something of an anomaly.
A vampire who balked at the sight of blood.
Then how did she survive, I wonder? Prompts invisibly inserted and tightly written.
DeleteGood call, Sandra. That actually did occur to me later. Maybe she feeds with eyes closed or has someone bring her sustenance in a coloured glass/plastic bottle. I guess I didn't really think it through. ::::Sigh::::
DeleteWas merely a musing, not intended as any sort of interrogation - I'm more than happy to suspend belief!
DeleteRemark taken in the manner it was intended, I assure you. Like I said, the same thing occurred to me later and I felt obliged to try and explain it away...if only to myself!!!
DeleteI could easily answer that, Sandra, the vampires in my story found a solution. This is a very creative story, with a beautiful ending, and prompt use.
Deleteanother clever little story! I wrote a novel based on time travel, people criticised or commented on aspects of the time travel... which doesn't exist so there are no rules. Vampires are myths, there are no rules. In GRRM's book Fevre Dream, he has vampires with mirrors and everything! Go for it, be different!
DeleteMen!! [Threshold 166]
ReplyDeleteRaven thrust me aside. Began to dress.
I checked out the window but the man no longer visible from our second storey elevation.
I snatched at Raven’s arm. ‘Who is he?’
‘Law. He’ll be looking for evidence –’
‘Forensics? Fingerprints and such? He’ll want to dig her up –‘
‘And when he finds the teeth-marks he’ll have to blame the dog. Not sure which’ll cause the bigger stir –‘
Raven’s grim expression belied his joking words.
‘There’s blood on our clothes!’
‘All burnt –‘
‘So what do I wear now?’
He glanced. Assessed. Grinned. ‘Naked might provide a useful distraction.’
How Machiavelianly simple this story is. Which also added to my enjoyment.The prompts were blended in seamlessly.
DeleteMy first thought was, "Very saucy, Raven!" Although I don't think many people use "saucy" these days. This was more lighthearted than many installments and goes to prove that you can move the tale along with interest and intrigue regardless of the created atmospherics.
DeleteSaucy is good, Patricia, perhaps we ought to work at bringing it back! It fits this instalment perfectly. Good one, Sandra!
DeleteChange of focus [239]
ReplyDeleteThe plane was delayed. The Customs officer’s eyes travelled between face and passport photo with a forensic intensity that suggested he was auditioning for the part.
Bekim in the flesh more intimidating than Pettinger had anticipated. Judging by the elevation of Bekim’s eyebrows Pettinger himself much less so.
In the car he failed to recognise the road he’d taken not that long ago. Fighting sleep, he stirred, ‘Where –?’ he began.
Bekim took his hand from the steering wheel. Reached down into the central pocket. A single-stripe flash as streetlights reflected on steel. A sharp pain to Pettinger’s thigh.
Oblivion.
A very unexpected ending and a good one. Your opening lines were basically perfect.
DeleteThis just gets more involved with every episode. Again, use of those short, sharp passages fit the story to an absolute tee in this instance. So skilled was this that the prompt words were invisible.
DeleteI was reading earlier today about a South American footballer who carried needles onto the pitch to spike the opposition strikers... then I find a needle taking Pettinger out of it - oh my, what next for our intrepid MC?
DeleteCripplegate Junction/Part 100-Waits And Measures
ReplyDeleteWith her customary air of elevated self-importance, the Grande Dame stirred two measured teaspoons of sugar into her cup of lapsang souchong. Raising the fragrant beverage to her lips with extended pinky, she considered her situation with all the concentrated analysis of a forensic scientist.
Seemingly, the wretched delivery boy dispatched in search of her valuable lost item would not be returning in time, leaving her with only one course of action.
Collecting her carpet bag from the seat, she exited onto the platform and disappeared within the dusty depths of the empty Waiting Room.
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To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/cripplegate.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
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I think the Grande Dame, and her elevated importance, is one of my favourite Cripplegate characters. Such smooth prompts too.
DeleteIt almost felt like a scene from a Bond movie. When time allows I'll need to check the previous episodes out. I did like the prompt use.
DeleteAnd this, I note, the hundredth episode - congratulations!
DeleteWell, thank you, Sandra. I find it rather hard to believe myself. Still looking for a cohesive, satisfying and non-nonsensical (is that a word?) way to wrap this up.
Deletenot yet, Patricia, not yet, I am enjoying Cripplegate much too much. This is one fine character to have, she is straight out of the movies and would attract attention anywhere she went.
DeleteDon't look too hard. And don't believe it when you do - episodes 161 and 162 of Threshold were both intended as Grand Finales, but no-one noticed so I carried on!
DeleteKursaal (Episode Seventy Four) -- "Every Picture Tells A Story"
ReplyDeleteIsabel la Gaya was proud of her achievements in the field of post-mortem photography. It was really more of a vocation (although she would never abandon fortune-telling) than a hobby and she succeeded admirably in elevating what might be customary forensic-style crime shots to a sophisticated and pleasing art form.
Unfortunately, her latest showpieces could not be displayed for fear of stirring up more unwanted speculation than already existed.
After all, Alexis Champagne and Dottie Randall were officially listed only as missing persons.
Not deceased.
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To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale, please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/kursaal.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
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Ooh - wicked depths and unsuspectedness - so succinctly done.
DeleteI don't know, it might be protected by the First Amendment, provided it's in America of course. an dyes this is very disqueiting and enjoyablly mysterious.
Deletenice one. A Thirteen author lives in Southend on Sea, Essex, his address contains the name Kursaal, so I think of you and this series every time he sends in a story. How good is that??
DeleteA degree of knowledge is a dangerous thing
ReplyDeleteProbably every bloke on this forensic science degree course was as disappointed as I by the lack of Emilia Fox look-alikes. Only two stirred my interest, and they’d enrolled in hope of someone fitter-looking than me.
Soon became clear, though, I’d the strongest stomach.
TV’s not allowed to show the full reality of death. The written word better infiltrates one’s mind but only actuality – the smell of putrefaction, the buzzing of a zillion flies, the oozing liquefaction – elevated the whole experience to match my expectation.
And only by learning how evidence trapped the killer was I equipped to avoid it.
This is really good, Sandra. The show Dexter comes to mind here. Your writing is crisp and the prompts were cleverly used. This person should get together with Patricia's Isabela.
DeleteOh yes. Totally delicious stuff. That ending crept up on me and was the last thing I expected. The descriptions reminded me of what I believe are called body farms. Beautiful composition that had me completely fooled until the last line.
Deletevery nicely done, lulling us into a false sense of security and then pouncing!
DeleteKandar 14: A Turn of a Friendly Card
ReplyDelete“You’re close little one. I’m no direct danger to my brother. I can’t be, thanks to good old dad. They’ll be vexed and confused. More concerned about how a thief got by their precious wards. It’ll raise an unholy stir, for sure. They’ll believe every thief knows forensics be damned. They’ll round up every robber, con artist and cutpurse in the city, who, as expected, will fight back. You see, elevated reasoning isn’t Galiel’s strength. He’ll just see the poor thief who died trying to get into the library. Come Papa, time to get an arm’s reach ahead of events.”
This one of your very best Jeffrey - well-developed and considered.
DeleteThis was hugely enjoyable and very well put together. I have to agree with Sandra. This is one of your best to date, Jeffrey.
Deletedistinct improvement, I am happy to say.
DeleteOde to Cereal
ReplyDeleteCreated in 1863, but very inconvenient.
Fortunately it was elevated twenty-two years later.
Most of us do it every day.
It’s become a forensic debate.
Add the sugar first or last?
Fruit in both or just for hot?
We always add a dab more milk.
To stir with love, churn, or neither?
Juice and burned bread
Sometime before bed
and even while she’s still in it,
With a rose.
Do you have it at night?
Are you sure that’s alright?
If you used beer,
Would it sound like?
Snap, crackle, burp instead?
Next thing we’ll have,
Alarm clocks that snooze.
This was ingenious and I could actually relate to every line. What a very innovative use of the prompt words which, I might add, were hidden nicely within the text. You are on something of a roll this week, Jeffrey.
Deleteyes, this is clever!
DeleteThe Mad Italian no 9
ReplyDeleteThe question always and ever is, can you elevate your minds to capture the essence of what life is really about? Forensic experts are everywhere in your world today, but they deal with the dead. We are concerned with the living, we want to make a stir, we want to provoke a reaction that will bring beauty, comfort, peace and ease to all. Now the other question is, can this be achieved with man’s mind the way it is right now? I see shootings in one country and an unnecessary crippling fire in another. Is there any hope for you?
I doubt mankind has much changed, perhaps the speed at which the knowledge is disseminated has made it appear more so. So thought-provoking this series, I fail to notice the writing.
DeleteInformation overload. Perhaps our desire(need?) to know more has created a situation where we know less. Jack of all, yet master of none.
DeleteVery well written and prompts well considered.
I love how the Mad Italian is reflective and has a point to make every single time. This is such a unique concept, even more so that the "Infiniti" serialization. I adore things that are different from anything else immediately available and this more than meets my criteria in that respect.
DeleteCareer choice
ReplyDeleteForensic science is a good thing to study, a good career to follow, lots of money in it because, let’s face it, how many people want to earn their living dealing with bits of dead humans? I love it. Love the indepth findings through the microscope, which elevates the cells from blobs to living entities that betray their secrets. I relish the feeling of power, my reports dictate the work the detectives do, stir them into action, get them motivated.
And then, when day is done and evenings stretch out endlessly, there are body parts with which to create art.
That prompt word has sent us down many nasty paths this week hasn't it? And this but another example.
DeleteI thought this would be a case of puppet master or marionette, until that last beautiful line.
DeleteAnd yet another killer last line. The entries this week are overflowing with them. I do believe this is one of the best.
DeleteThe Adventures of Rosebud, Pirate Princess #81
ReplyDeleteMultiple Ways to Decrease Corruption
The Police of Storm have been pioneering a new method of investigation called forensics. It’s supposed to find out criminals more accurately. I wonder if it will decrease the number of Police elevated to knighthood for crimes they themselves committed and then “solved”. It should at least stir things up a bit in that part of the world. Maybe Georgiana and I will get a break from our monthly journeys. Someone needs to transport the assassin you know.
As Patricia and John already said, it's an honor to be in such distinguished company.
DeleteLoved the line about solving crimes they committed. Very well crochet prompt use.
DeleteMagnificent reference to what is a "new method of investigation" in Rosebud's world. And what a concept..."Police elevated to knighthood for crimes they themselves committed and then 'solved.'" Mind you, on reflection, perhaps that isn't too far from the truth in today's world either.
DeleteWonderful - and that second sentence a total delight.
DeleteGoing Down
ReplyDeleteCouldn't predict if this would be a social call or a forensic examination. He stirred, and I knew - they hadn't gotten here. Yet.
Went to the desk, found the papers. By then he'd sat up, sudden elevation not helping his hangover. "Whatcha doin?"
"Saving your life, if you can get off that couch."
Furious blinking helped him understand. "They know?"
"Yeah, they know. C'mon."
We got to the elevator but their car was on the way up. I hit the lobby button and jumped out, pulling him towards the fire escape. "I hope you're not afraid of heights."
A very tight story, afraid of heights while using the fire escape.
DeleteAck. Any mention of heights and my head is already spinning. As always, sharp, cutting and intensely entertaining.
DeleteThe title perfect, the tale tight and full-packed with action and atmosphere. Thank you Bill.
Delete