An apology. I forgot how much the reading and writing
of ‘yawn’ automatically produced one, but am happy to report that not one of the
stories concocted around the use of it did anything but jolt a response of one
sort or another from me.
This week, I thought I’d allow myself an honourable
mention or two, as well as a winner, but when it got to four ‘must includes’ I
ditched the idea and, although it feels a little bizarre – and perhaps
ungrateful to all you wonderful stalwarts – I’m handing the top place rosette
to Unknown’s ‘Slip-Sliding Away, for
the delight of the opening sentence and the solidity of the tale.
Words
for next week: cremate monkey suede
Entries
by midnight Thursday 26th July,
words and winners posted Friday 27th
Usual rules: 100 words maximum (excluding title) of flash
fiction or poetry using all of the three words above in the genres of horror,
fantasy, science fiction or noir. Serialised fiction is, as always, welcome.
All variants and use of the words and stems are fine. Feel free to post links
to your stories on Twitter or Facebook or whichever social media you prefer.
ReplyDeleteBurners
"Cremate the monkey!" Nigel sang loudly.
Farley switched the radio station. Though there were only two. Classic Rock and the News. "It's "shock the monkey," you moron."
Nigel shrugged and continued pushing the corpses into the raging fire.
The plague had taken a toll on the city. So many dead in such a short time. The former sanitation workers found themselves now working as burners.
Farley missed the old days of picking up trash instead of rotted bodies.
Nigel started humming "Blue Suede Shoes." Farley rolled his eyes but he let it alone and soon found himself humming as well.
Crafty and clever!
DeleteYes, this was a clever one. Nigel seems to enjoy his work, though. Very commendable.
DeleteWell written, entertaining and witty. More pressure on the rest of us to reach the bar.
DeleteNicely done, RJ. Those sanitation people always get the short end of the stick. Well written.
Deletefun!
Deleteliked this, RJ, clever story!
DeleteIt's the familiarity of the task that breed the boredom that makes the humour pop.
DeleteLove that the humming caught on. That so often happens and now I've got the song in my head too, although it's not the Elvis version but "Big Mama" Thornton. If there could only be two radio stations, I'm comforted by the fact that Classic Rock is one of them. Nice little tale with some very satisfying interaction.
DeleteYour darkly humorous, offerings are always a pleasure to read RJ.
DeleteUnkown, congrats on having taken the top spot for last week, you had a very good story.
ReplyDeleteThe unknown writer is now known. Hope to read more from this author.
DeleteCongratulations to "unknown" indeed!!! So, clue me in...who is it?
DeleteSo, who IS this fountain of unknown talent? And how come John knows and I don't, hmmm? Answer that and stay fashionable!
DeleteThe Great White Hunter
ReplyDeleteBy request, Joseph was cremated in his white suede monkey jacket. Somehow, he’d managed to skin the ultra-rare albino mountain gorilla in one piece. After getting it processed, he simply had to slip it on like a sweatshirt. The people of PITA were not pleased. Nor were they pleased with his black-footed ferret lounging slippers or his bald eagle fedora.
Ashley slipped away from the protest line and snatched the urn from the grieving widow’s hands. Driving three anxious hours to the farm, standing knee deep in pig shit, she scattered his ashes. Never had she felt so whole.
Oh! All three prompts in one 11 word sentence!! There's clever!
DeleteAll three prompts in the opening sentence, excellent writing. The rest of the story is pretty darn good to.
DeleteLoved this, John. The name is just coincidence, right? Although, ferret slippers do sound luxurious. Great ending.
Deletei love a good comeuppance tale.
Deletetis another clever tale. I will have to do some thinking... I need to Do Better
DeleteFitting end! Nice work.
DeleteAs always, your submissions are original, entertaining and come with a spoonful of humour. Can't say I agree with Joseph's little hobby, but nice to see he got something of a comeuppance.
DeleteBrilliant opening line John. Well done .
DeletePromises...Promises...
ReplyDeleteHe said he wanted to be cremated. Dressed in his favourite chinos, long-sleeve shirt and suede loafers. No monkey business, he insisted. Burial totally out of the question. Didn't want to wake up in a box six feet under. Made me swear.
Of course, I acquiesced to his wishes.
Although I think he expected to be dead at the time.
A stand-up round of applause from me for this one - you truly have excelled yourself, Patricia - wonderful!
DeleteWow, what a magnificent last line. Great work, Patricia. Wonderful writing.
DeleteThe importance of communication.
DeleteShocking and entertaining, one of my favorite combinations. Great premise.
DeleteBest. Ending. Ever.
DeleteSuperb!
DeleteWicked sharp conclusion!
DeleteYou've done it again Patricia. complete story packed neatly into eight
Deletesentences. What an outstanding final line too.
Remind me before I get on your bad side, please? Tight writing, very good prompt use and so enjoyable.
ReplyDeleteThe Hurdy-Gurdy Man
ReplyDelete“I’m a businessman, my suit is a tattered grayish suede tuxedo, that makes me look like the walking ashes of a cremation. It took a while to figure out how everything worked. I always wished to be a wealthy musician but not a monkey’s uncle.
My instrument played the sweetest, most seductive, and tranquil love music that eternity ever heard. I became very wealthy, sneaking into houses while they listened to the music. The hurdy-gurdy man was on my tether and I was the thief. Wishes are tricky things. I’m still looking for that ring and singing songs of love.”
A powerful piece, Jeffrey. Well done.
DeleteVery nice. Made me look up the tune on Youtube.
DeleteIv'e heard the song but I didn't realize a hurdy gurdy was an instrument until this story and then looking it up. The enlightened stranger enlightened me.
Deletenice little tale
DeleteTricky little tale here, and a nice callout to a great song!
DeleteThis was very nicely done. Reminded me a little of "A Wandering Minstrel I" from The Mikado. Certainly remember "Hurdy-Gurdy Man" by Donovan. We used to call him the Poor Man's Bob Dylan. LOL. There's also something of the Pied Piper here. In short, it has more than one layer. Good job, Jeffrey.
DeleteKursaal (Episode One Hundred Twenty Three) - "Hocus Pocus""
ReplyDeleteMaximillian Corviday was adverse to hiring what were popularly referred to as "freaks" (Monkey Boy, Camel Girl and such) with one notable exception: Ruby and Rita Deviant, Conjoined Twins.
Yet the sisters were not among the ensemble for physical peculiarity but rather for illusionary skills. Wearing gloves of supple suede, they manipulated playing cards at blinding speed but their pièce de résistance was the Vanishing Cabinet.
It was rumoured that Alexis Champagne had entered the contraption before she disappeared and some claimed that cremated ashes often littered the floor.
Ruby and Rita, however, remained enigmatic regarding their box of tricks.
-------------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale, please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/kursaal.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------
NOTE: Maximillian Corviday, The Deviant Twins and Alexis Champagne have all featured in previous episodes.
Patricia, you never disappoint. Wonderful ending. Deviant twins among my favorite characters
DeleteSuperbly written, Patricia. Flowing and with nice use of the prompts.
DeleteVery clever, thank you for this.
DeleteSurreal, atmospheric and unsettling as ever. Good stuff.
DeleteIt's probably best for the twins to not reveal the details of their illusion. At least not until the ashes settle. Very nice story.
Delete"Deviant Twins"... what a wonderfully deviant phrase, Sandra.
Deletehave to agree with the deviant twins, what else are they going to get up to, one wonders...
Delete"We're going to need another volunteer!" *shudder*
DeleteAfter reading the entries so far, I am not all that confident in my own submission, but I still wanted to try.
ReplyDeleteDad wanted to be buried in coveralls, and a pine box. But we cremated him, burned to ashes, nothing larger than a monkey’s finger. Sometimes it hits me hard, knowing the face I loved all my life simply did not exist any longer. No more deep voice singing “Sixteen Tons” when he heard it on the radio.
No coveralls, but we did give him his suede “pimp hat” that he loved. “What’s my occupation!” he would ask, laughing. He sits on the mantle, lid screwed down tight. So he can’t come back. He still cries, quietly, in that urn.
Dave, fear not. Your entry is brilliant, the ending heart wrenching and just a bit creepy. Great job
DeleteI agree with Joe, a very well done story. "Pimp" hat and I had Tennessee Ernie Ford singing in my mind.
DeleteThank you Joe and Jeffrey. I wanted to incorporate my Father into the story. He passed a few months ago. Yes, he was cremated. No, his urn doesn't make any noise.
DeleteThis definitely hits the horror spot, subtle, yes, but that's often the most unsettling, and the hardest to write. (And it's not unusual to think the definitive entry has already been written - one reason I sometimes don't comment until I've written my version of the prompt words)
DeleteWell done, Dave. The lid being screwed down tight is a perfect way to inject so many revelations without saying another word.
DeleteTouching, yet disturbing, my friend
Delete"He still cries, quietly, in that urn." A haunting and splendid finale to a marvelous tale, Dave.
Deletethere's delicate horror touches throughout that story, difficult to do and you did it.
DeleteI am a delicate, subtle flower... Thank you all!
DeleteA crying urn. Wonderful detail.
DeleteSo glad you decided to submit this. I know the tales here can sometimes be a little intimidating (there's such a wealth of talent) but we would have lost out enormously if we hadn't got to enjoy this story. And what a poignant ending...crying quietly while in the urn. Some of the phrases here were quite exquisite.
DeleteA emotionally touching but spooky offering in the right amounts Dave. Well delivered. Glad you decided to submit.
DeleteHere We Come
ReplyDeleteThe cremation facility was located on the Yorkshire moors. Snow drifts and bleak skies. Suede slippers to discourage us from escaping.
Graffiti on the wall declared - Welcome to the Planet of the Apes!
Simian flu was at its height. Monkey cadavers piling high. Laid on conveyors. Trundled toward the incinerator. Guards torturing us with the theme song from The Monkees on an endless loop.
“Hunt for decent sized bones,” said one of the lags.
“Why?” I asked, poking the ashes.
He winked.
“Sharpen them for knives. Screws are gonna burn.”
Song kicked in for the billionth time.
Really good, David. Great use of the prompts. Captivating story well written.
DeleteDavid, another story that had a song in my head and I liked that show. Tight writing and nice use of the prompts.
DeleteVery good story! I could see it all as it played out.
DeleteThis epic in it's breadth of place and time and happenings. And more than a little unsettling.
DeleteI'm routing for the inmates. I usually do. I like a good prison story, this one being so surreal and entertaining.
DeleteA very interesting excursion into the realm of creepy, David. An absolutely beautifully crafted third paragraph!
Deletethere's visions coming out of the entries this week which are going to linger...
DeleteLove the blue-collar plotting at the end - it grounds the fantasy into something gritty and real.
DeleteNow this was definitely thinking outside the box. There were a plethora of musical references this week and I was delighted at the memory prompt of this one. I could just picture that ape from "2001, A Space Odyssey" who wielded that bone suddenly realizing what else it could be used for. I know that wasn't the case here, but still.....
DeleteFirst Date
ReplyDeleteShe loved Elvis. Blue Suede Shoes reverberated against basement walls. She hummed along, smiling, working.
“Don’t squirm so, little monkey. How can I make a proper incision?”
Beneath her scalpel, naked, trussed, gagged, eyes terrified and pain filled, lay last night’s date. His eyes darted from her to scalpel to the huge, hot oven.
“You enjoyed last night, right? I let you do anything you wanted. My turn now. First, a filet for breakfast, then the oven. I wonder if cremation is as painful as it looks. I’ll remove the gag later. How loud you scream will tell me.”
Joe, a criminally marvelous story. and a third song for me to sing to. A new meaning to the phrase-"One good turn deserves another." Tight writing and a nice last line.
DeleteIt made me squirm in my chair! Very well written.
DeleteA horrid scene, skilfully depicted, and made all the worse for the contrasting innocence of the title.
DeleteMan, I hope he did everything he wanted with her... he's entitled to that at least. Very vivid, very well done.
DeleteA wickedly delightful tale, Joe!
Deletedefinitely evil - and well done.
DeleteShe's quite the cut-up. :) ... I'll see myself out.
DeleteWhat a deliciously nasty little story. I hope he enjoyed that night...it's going to be his last and no mistake. Bon appetit enterprising lady!
DeleteDREAMING OF AMELIA
ReplyDeleteAmelia wobbled unsteadily in a bloody viscous puddle, her eyes frozen with the silky look of fathomless fear. Her right hand clutched her brow, where a ragged hole spurted greasy lumps of brain into the churning muck. Her left gripped a jagged gash in her stomach that spewed crimson clumps of ropy intestines into the curdling miasma.
Morning arrived. Amelia’s brutal cousin Clayton, who despised her, waited. She entered the kitchen, her face a suede-smooth, semi-cremated red. One hand was glued to her brow, the other to her stomach.
He smiled. “Hey, monkey breath,” I dreamed about you last night.”
A horrific tale, J.E. filled with visual imagry horrific and frightening. Very good.
DeleteSo horrific that the normal response at discovering 'it was just a dream' is entirely absent. Such lovely word choices, as ever.
DeleteTruly the epitome of horror in so few words. Very well done.
DeleteI'm not sure which is scarier, Clayton's greeting or the fact that Amelia is still walking. A beautifully written engrossing tale.
Deletethis is horror in 100 words, where others take 1000 to say the same thing, but not as well as this.
DeleteLovingly ambiguous, and chilling.
DeleteAs Joe put it, this was totally "horrific." I like that we're not entirely sure of Amelia's current state. This would make a wonderful "Black Mirror" episode.
DeleteChange of focus [291]
ReplyDeleteUnsure whether caused by suspicion or the cheap suede upholstery of Filip’s car Pettinger felt his skin contract in what he’d long ago learnt heralded danger. But from Filip, who he’d known from first school? The two of them, and Dalmat, three monkeys, though in the end the word used had been shejtan hadn’t it? After Dalmat set light to the teacher’s dog in what he claimed was a ritual cremation.
‘I didn’t know Valdeta had moved –‘
‘Two days ago. Not voluntarily.’
‘Meaning?’
‘Someone burned them out their house.’
‘Bollocking Christ, what the hell for? Who?‘
‘Only one fatality.’
Who, indeed. Well crafted, beautifully written. Wonderful use of the prompts.
DeleteTalk about a cliff hanger...
DeleteWell crafted, Sandra. Only Pettinger would say, "Bollocking Christ."
Jeffrey here. Excellent last line. Enjoyed your description of Pettinger’s danger response.
DeletePettinger's ongoing story seems to fit the prompts, rather than the other way round!
DeleteThe intrigue is palpable, and Pettinger is full of charisma!
DeleteOne fatality? Yikes! Who? So like you to leave it there. I'm going to have to remember "Bollocking Christ." What a marvelous expletive suitable for so many occasions! I always wish the limit was beyond 100 words. I'm always panting for more when it comes to Pettinger.
DeleteProbably not the right answer [Threshold 214]
ReplyDeleteI bit down hard, Whorled fingertip rough against the soft suede of my tongue. His monkey yelp became gorilla roar as the pain arrived; as the old coin taste of blood flooded my mouth. Loosing my teeth, I let him go. Turned my head and spat scarlet petals onto the chequered tiles.
No, I was not yet mature.
Just mad.
For him, of course which, intellectually, was something of a shock. Exactly what would it take to destroy desire? Incinerate emotion. To cremate every vestige of care?
I could not imagine but from his face guessed I’d soon find out.
Jeffrey again. Sandra, IMHO one of you best installments in this series. Excellent description of the change in mood.
DeleteWell written. I felt the pain of the bite. Your descriptions are vivid and riveting
DeleteNice description - brutal and eloquent!
DeleteOoohh....I do believe Raven is angry. Have a feeling she wouldn't like him when he's angry. Love the imagery, both visual and otherwise, such as the "old coin taste of blood" and a "monkey yelp" becoming a "gorilla roar." Such an incredible way with words. Can I be you when I grow up?
DeleteWhat started out as an intimate act turned around quite quickly. A real literary piece done so well.
ReplyDeletesavagery in the bite and in the description. Very vivid.
DeletePirate Doctor-5
ReplyDelete“Bring as much of the medical equipment from the Sagittarius as possible and the stuff from my quarters, don’t forget my suede suits.”
“Much better Uhlan, and with humor.” replied Darza.
Did you know that pirates don’t cremate, they just open an air lock. Nelzar was improving and everything I requested was brought over. I’m Rethic’s tethered monkey. Have I deluded myself that this was for the passengers instead of me?
Didn’t Milton say; “For here I may reign secure, and in my choice to reign is worth ambition though in chaos to never serve, but bring the light of order.”
Nicely done, Jeffrey. Well written, excellent use or the prompts. I enjoyed this.
DeleteYou included the prompts in a very creative manner, Jeffrey. Well done!
DeleteSuede suits in space - that's the name of your novel.
DeleteAs often happens, you have taken us to a situation which bears thinking about more closely. Love that "pirates don't cremate" but simply "open an air lock." You are on something of a roll this week, Jeffrey.
DeleteCripplegate Junction/Part 149 - The Signal Box Revisited (a/k/a Departures)
ReplyDeleteThe Conductor's "All Aboard!" declaration failed to encourage the train's departure, although it had summoned an elderly grease monkey who stared vacantly at the pilot wheel.
Annunciation duties fulfilled, the Conductor returned to the Signal Box where he'd found the sepia photograph of original Cripplegate staff (himself not included) which the Rook had since pilfered. The place surely held more secrets.
Behind levers coated in a suede-like green patina, stood rows of crematorium urns -- ceramic, metal, stone, wood -- all bearing small identification tags.
The Conductor did not investigate further.
He feared his name was among the departed.
-------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/cripplegate.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------
What a strange and wonderful place, this Cripplegate.
DeletePatricia, what an excellent play on words in the last line-the conductor, who shouts "All Aboard!" is afraid he's a departed. Suede-like patina is a very good phrase.
DeleteThis whole tale has been rich indeed - this a prime, prime example, on very many levels.
Deletewe're back with the vivid imagery again, this is particularly well done, I like the thought of the urns all lined up and he afraid to look at them.
DeleteAn incredible last line, brilliantly placed among vivid detail. Wonderful, Patricia.
DeleteGreat, great, great ending.
DeleteMaking A Living
ReplyDeleteCyrus missed the good old days when demands were satisfied without question and supply welcomed while nobody gave a monkey's about how you came by it. But that was when suede was considered a luxury and the common laborer drank barleywine instead of fancy imported beer. A bygone time and no mistake.
Damn crematoriums had been the downfall of the honest hardworking grave robber.
You definitely have a way with the final sentence. It really shone bright.
DeleteA noble craft, that of the grave robber. Without such dedicated workers, we would have no Frankensteines. An enjoyable read, Patricia.
DeleteThis is an excellent story, tight writing, good prompt use, and as John said, one very good last line.
DeleteI'm running out of praise for your inventive mind and the skills with which you bring your unique ideas to life. Please believe this is utterly brilliant.
DeleteI've a half written novel based on the bodysnatchers. I like this!!
DeleteThe good old days, indeed. Grave robbing gone the way of the buggy whip, I fear. Nicely done. Well written
DeleteAn honest gravedigger - loved it.
DeleteOK, this time I got it right, blame the heat...
ReplyDeleteStop the week; I want to get off (1)
Saturday was a Pride parade, shouts, whistles, Samba band and rainbow flags. They’re trying to cremate past attitudes, not sure it’s working. Sunday was an all day water slide, bunch of mad monkeys going headfirst down the street, noise, music and screams. Monday the shop was stuffed with Chinese dragon fighting kites and other goodies, Tuesday the shop was stuffed with items from the closed down (30 years ago or more) shop next door. Dust and grease needing more than the touch of suede to shift. I need to move…
This reads as a very eloquent plea for help, prompts so smoothly incorporated..
DeleteThe hectic lifestyle doesn't bode well with the narrator...hey wait, don't you work in a shop??
DeleteWoven prompts, flowing writing, and you turned a diary entry into a story. IMHO, this should be in the running for this weeks best.
DeleteThe perils of residing in a vacation area. Enough to make me lock the door and hide under the bed. Well written, and vividly described
DeleteBroken, beleaguered, and beguiled - all in 100 words!
DeleteOh my goodness. You must have the patience of a saint, Antonia. I fear I would have closed up shop and gone home faced with such a jumble of activities. This was such a down-to-earth tale and crafted with such expertise as to make the prompts invisible.
DeleteStop the week; I want to get off (2)
ReplyDeleteJust when it couldn’t get worse, it gets worse. My beloved larch bonsai, grown from seed and now 33 years old, sold today. Two more to go. Truthfully, a monkey could make a better job of pruning and repotting the bonsai now, the hands are fit for cremating, if I could obtain new ones, preferably with suede palms so I didn’t keep dropping things.
The shop begins to look like a sensible establishment again. The heat goes on (there’s a song in there somewhere) which doesn’t promote an incentive to vacuum and re-arrange so it can wait. For now.
And the story continues...nicely done. Not many can come up with such a relevant sequel while maintaining the integrity of what went before and still skillfully incorporate the prompts.
Deletethis is very therapeutic!
ReplyDeleteThanks for comments. Yes, a shop, but a shop where you would expect feast and famine times, right now it's all feast and the walls have stopped being elastic. Having said that... some of the goodies from the closed down shop include about 100 ft of glass shelving. I need shelving more than I need food at times so I am overly excited about the possibility of having such a wonderful bonus. Calculating the cost paid for the many many items left in the shop all those years (bicycle parts and tyres, electric components, bulbs and more bulbs, it looks as if we got the shelving for nothing. All we have to do is spray paint the supports and wash X thousand (I exaggerate just a little) glass shelves which have 30+ years of accumulated dust on them. But... we keep saying it's worth it. I might even believe it one day! OK, Leo's here...
The Mad Italian 65
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the monkey house, where the chattering forces gather to gnash their gums and cremate all ideas by talking them out of existence. I notice some members sliding gently into sleep. Methinks the seats should be suede covered for fear of them sliding gently to the floor in their slumber.
Resignations seems to be the word of the moment, ‘we cannot agree therefore we have to depart.’ What came of discussion and negotiated agreement? Or are these words no longer in the governmental vocabulary? Apart from shouting ‘Order! Order!’ what does the Speaker of the house do for democracy?
Jeffrey on lunch. What a beautiful opening line. It flowed and wonderful use of the prompts.
DeleteCremation of ideas is the most chilling image I've read this week.
DeleteWhat purpose other than yelling "Order! Order!" indeed? But that could stand true for so many governmental officials regardless of the words that spew from their mouths. Something I'm convinced Leonardo is well aware of. Very little escapes that man's grasp of situations.
DeleteSorry no diaries this week.. laptop is at the pc doctors so borrowing a note pad to add a quick entry.
ReplyDeleteSoft as suede, his voice barely concealed the rising menace in his tone. 'You owe me a monkey. ' He held the man by the coat lapels.
The man'a eyes were watering,as much from fear as from acrid smoke drifting in the air.
Stepping away from him, I created a safety zone. 'It's an orangutan,' I reminded him as he surveyed the cremated remains, 'an if you used a damn rifle Reggie, instead of a fucking flame thrower, you'd have more to show for it.'
Reggie looked at us with his fixed, insane, grin. 'Where's the fun in that brother.
?'
I love this. "You owe me a monkey." That line sells it.
Delete"where's the fun in that?" indeed! Very creative, Terrie!
Deletelovely last line!
DeleteMonkeys as criminal currency - excellent!
DeleteAs much as I miss the adventures of our favourite armadillos, this was a very worth substitute. Prime use of the prompt words and, as always, you are the mistress of vivid phrasing. Absolutely adored that last line.
DeleteWorth, of course, should read "worthy." Sheesh...!!!!
DeleteLate to comment, but this is delightful! I find myself thinking you're so good with animals but not sure the RSPCA would agree.
DeleteJeffrey here on lunch. An enjoyable twist on using a hammer to kill a fly. Good prompt use and well written. Your stories don’t disappoint.
ReplyDeleteStop the week; I want to get off (3)
ReplyDeleteSo much for the shop looking sensible; a phone call, more stuff, so interesting Shaun forgot to go to Newport and look at a computer. Finally got him gone. This will seem like us monkeying around but Shaun dashed in at closing time, when the heat was fit to cremate anyone out in it, saying he had to rush off to the circus – in town for the next two months – as Pepe the Clown has stuff to sell. I really couldn’t make this up! Suede pads for the eyes, please… and more to view next week… furniture this time…
Oh how I do hope this continues. Such entertaining snippets.
DeleteI'm full of admiration for your ability to find the time to turn this activity into anecdote for us - thank you..
Delete"Where you off to?"
ReplyDelete"Nowhere in particular."
"Going to 'cremate the ol' monkey, huh?"
"What? What does that even ..."
"Going to crush the suede?"
"I don't ..."
"Immolate the streetlamp? Resuscitate the frog? You know what I mean..."
"Dude. Stop."
"By the way, I'm from another planet, I drink human blood and you're next."
"Right. Tell me another one."
Such compelling dialogue Creepy. An impressive submission. It drew me in and wouldn't let go.
DeleteSo difficult to tell a tale in dialogue only. I shall take a lesson from this example because it could not have been better executed. I understand this is your debut in this forum. So glad you stopped by and look forward to more from your talented plume.
DeleteWelcome Creepy Snowman - and what a wonderfully entertaining introduction this is - a truly inventive approach to the prompt words. Thank you also for commenting - so essential on this site.
Deletetis good to see you here, thanks for coming! Lovely dialogue based piece that works. Good one.
ReplyDeleteI'm a sucker for good dialogue, Creepy. Well done!
ReplyDeleteFor some reason, I'm not allowed to comment on anything else at the moment. I shall reboot and return shortly.
ReplyDeleteThe Adventures of Rosebud, Pirate Princess #139
ReplyDeleteAnother Adventure
Luckily Roxie was allowed to stay in the contest, no thanks to those buffoons. Even monkeys have more sense. At least no one threatened cremation, arson is bad enough. There was that one monk who wanted to turn her into suede boots during the last ‘no purple tigers’ incident.
Well it looks like we got fifth place, not bad for a car that crashed halfway through. Rosebud and Natasha should be here tomorrow. Maybe I should pack up.
Enjoyable light humor in the last line. Nicely woven prompts.
DeleteEspecially enjoyed the 'monk who wanted to turn her into suede boots' and well done for both another marvelously inventive episode and getting it in on time.
DeleteMonkey Business
ReplyDeleteMy next client stepped through the door at eight AM. He wore a nightmare of a suede suit, all bangles and fringe. The monkey he was carrying had a little vest to match. I waited for him to start speaking.
Once he paused for breath, I asked the first question. “Why do you believe your mother was murdered, Mr. Benzin?” He started, then gathered himself. “Isn’t it obvious? They cremated her, with no autopsy.” A large Mason jar thudded on my desk. “I’m certain the ashes contain a clue.”
It was going to be a long day.
This is a very good story. Unusual, intriguing and yet a hint of mystery despit ot hidden by the the absurd. Good job with the prompts.
DeleteAs ever Bill this was a pleasure to read, good to hear your so very individual voice again.
DeleteTime to call in Inspector Cluseau! A quickly moving tale that led to a great last line, Bill!
ReplyDelete