A week of richness, of fat stories threaded with slender, insidious
horrors (some of which simultaneously invoke guilty laughter). I love to read
them as they trickle in but on Thursday, when my initial shortlist includes
everyone, I know I’m in trouble. This week’s final, post-my-bedtime spurt of offerings doubled that trouble. Not that I’m complaining but I am
acutely aware that to pick one winner, apart from being near impossible for me,
appears to suggest others were in some way lacking – not true!
But choose I must ... and it is Jim’s ‘As always’ which, so very marginally, takes the top spot.
And my thanks to you all.
Words for next week: dog opportunity ridicule
Entries by
midnight Thursday 19th April winners
and words posted Friday 20th
Usual rules: 100 words maximum (excluding title) of flash
fiction or poetry using all of the three words above in the genres of horror, fantasy,
science fiction or noir. Serialised fiction is, as always, welcome. All
variants and use of the words and stems are fine. Feel free to post links to
your stories on Twitter or Facebook or whichever social media you prefer.
I didn't get a chance to comment much this last round, but I'll do better this time. Jim, I went back and read your story and it was really good - deserving of the top spot.
ReplyDeleteFreak Show
ReplyDeleteThe dog boy rested on his haunches, waiting for the opportune instant, his limited mind churning with rage, ridiculed one time too many.
The hunters prowled, in and out of the surrounding woods, searching. A tawny coated man turned loose a pair of hounds. They would find him soon enough, but not quite yet.
Theodore, the owner of the side show called out, erroneously assuming the dog boy would trust him. As the hounds howled, Theodore raised his head to shout, exposing his tender flesh.
In death, the dog boy’s jaws remained clenched at Theodore’s throat. The side show never re-opened.
This would make for a good novel, I think. Shades Of Richard Laymon or Tim Lebbon.
DeleteVery vividly portrayed; the first sentence especially good.
Deletebrilliant imagery - I could see dog boy on his haunches waiting to pounce while the hunters ranged about searching for him.
DeleteHis limited mind churning with rage... beautiful, John. As I've said before, you create such vivid and powerful images with words. You are a true craftsman!
DeleteThe side show never re opened. Great line. Terrific story
Deleteclever writing here to induce vivid images in our minds.
DeleteI loved all of this, but I think it was that final line that rose the piece to an above excellence position. Side shows are largely a thing of the past these days but I must be honest, I have always found the concept to be fascinating.
DeleteI had what is known as a "sneaky feeling" you would rise to the top with that one, Jim. Exceedingly nicely done and well deserved. And as for John's "Freak Show" (which I will comment on more fully later), I do believe I'm going to have to annex it as part and parcel of my "Kursaal" serialization.
ReplyDeletePayback Is...
ReplyDeleteOnly Charlie cared about what happened to Rex. They ignored jibes of ridicule at their appearance and seeming dull-wittedness. They were buddies. They had each other.
"Good riddance," came the comment when a traffic lull offered the opportunity to haul Rex's mangled carcass off the highway. He'd been splattered by a little yellow roadster. Hit and run. Charlie imagined life would be lonely and miserable now...much like before Rex.
He watched and waited for that yellow car to come back. And then, the hound dog planned to chase it straight into the gates of hell.
He knew the way.
wow. I'm against some stiff competiton this week already, I see. Love it! Great job, Patricia.
DeleteCrikey - so unexpected. And hugely imaginative.
Deleteinitially I wanted to pat poor Charlie on the head but hastily withdrew my hand when I realised where it might lead to. Very inventive and cleverly deceptive POV. Left me wanting more.
DeleteThat was so good. Well executed. Wonderful
DeleteAh, some insight on why dogs chase cars. Very intriguing and very enjoyable.
ReplyDeleteNo doubt Cerberus will be waiting at the gates of Hell to assist Charlie. Very original, Patricia, and very well done.
ReplyDeleteThe dog was locked outside. For now. It had gone mad, like all the other animals. She cradled the shotgun, waiting, her breathing labored. Her leg was still bleeding. She could hear the low growl as it paced. She dared not make a sound, hoping it would lose interest.
ReplyDeleteHoping for an opportunity to get out of this abandoned van. She would still be safely locked away, but the food had run out.
What exactly happened? Why had all the animals turned?
How long would it last? The initial news had ridiculed the warnings.
But after the first few days...
This promises a continuation too horror-filled for me to contemplate reading. Yet I do wonder what caused the animals to turn ...
DeleteThis has tension, questions, and terror by the bucketful - my doors are firmly locked and so are my windows......
DeleteYour writing perfectly captures the fear overpowering this woman, RJ. I can feel it. Very nicely done!
DeleteI see some catastrophic event in which the people are dwindling but the animals are still running rampant, competing for food. And the humans are now near the bottom of the chain. Really creepy and well done.
DeleteScary and unsettling. Good and frightening.
DeleteI echo Joe in finding this essentially an unsettling story. I absolutely adore dogs and so, anything that portrays the animal in less than a positive light always unsettles me. I applaud R.J. for zeroing in on my weak spot in such a magnificent manner.
DeleteDog Star
ReplyDeleteDog was barking mad. Claimed to be the star at the centre of our universe. Never missed an opportunity to ridicule us.
“You are planets orbiting the brilliance of my luminosity,” he'd say. “Some are mere satellites of satellites.”
He had the audacity to refer to me as nothing more than a barren asteroid, devoid of any evidence of sentient life.
That's when I decided I had to extinguish the sun.
I gouged out the black hole in the basement, ran at him with all the force of a fiery meteor, sent him hurtling toward oblivion.
Ah, this is an ... interesting version. And good to be reminded of 'gouge'
DeleteStrangely compelling and thought provoking.
DeleteAm I nuts for wanting to shout 'Go,go,go you fiery little meteor. Send that puffed up star where the sun cant shine.'
A quite novel and interesting idea, David! A superb ending!
DeleteVery unusual and intriguing. These heavenly bodies have some personality flaws that may prove to be disastrous to the rest of the galaxy, if not the universe.
DeleteDon't mess with an asteroid. Nice take on the prompts.
DeleteLovely unusual take on the prompts. This had (in my opinion) the flavour of a graphic novel...a personal tribute to the wonderful imagery conveyed courtesy of the words.
Delete
ReplyDeleteDark Dogs And Hellhounds.
Empty echoes spark flashes of fear that rise and ignite
the opportunity to run from mind-beasts, curled about the muted-night.
They fill the startled moods of writers in conflict with blank pages,
Where each dark dog of creativity howls; or lies, chained in cages.
And hellhounds stalking, soft- pawed, through each completed tome
grind sharpened fangs upon the ragged flesh and whitened bone
Of plot, of point of view, or how each story can be stitched and sewn.
How easily they scratch critically at every printed mark and sign
Or ridicule the written word and tear it, line from line.
Welcome Terrie - and what a very classy start! So much resonates, especially 'writers in conflict with blank pages'.
DeleteSplendid use of language, Terrie. Like Sandra, I loved... of writers in conflict with blank pages. Also... dark dog of creativity - that is marvelous stuff!
DeleteThe woes of being a horror writer, stated in prose that is quite remarkable. I like your style, Terrie.
DeleteWonderful use of language. Very creative. You certainly know how to turn a phrase.
DeleteWelcome to our little meeting place, Terrie. And what a terrific contribution to mark your debut. We are so often lacking in tales woven in poetic form here. This was wonderfully creative with a superb sense of style. I was going to choose a few of my favourite phrases, but then realized I'd be quoting most of the poem!
DeleteTravel advice [Threshold 205]
ReplyDeleteI had, of course, been over-hasty. Left myself open to ridicule, which Raven recognised.
For a start, I’d no idea where O’Bedrun lived. Not even which direction. And although I told myself it would be an ideal opportunity to find out more about how well – and if – he knew my father, I also remembered he’d delivered the second-best fuck of my life.
Breaking into my thoughts, Raven said, ‘You’ll need horses –‘
Wearily, ‘We’ve none –‘
‘– and a dog, Pity Cathra’s dead –‘
‘You killed her –‘
‘She killed my grandmother.’
‘She did. Which pleased you more than me.’
Your economy of speech skilfully propelling the action forward leaves me envious Sandra. I must practice more .
DeletePretty chilling revelation about Raven's dislike of his grandmother. Well done.
DeleteVery well done. Not one wasted word, and ominous as well.
DeleteClipped exchanges have virtually become the hallmark between this couple at times. None better done than right here. This is a very smooth read which tells us much about the characters.
DeleteCripplegate Junction/Part 141 - Passages Of Time
ReplyDeleteSince the train's departure appeared nowhere near imminent, Poppy took the opportunity to open her dog-eared, well-thumbed copy of "Murder on the Orient Express." She'd been an avid reader since childhood. A pastime ridiculed by Violet, the empty-headed sister who had the nerve to call her brainless!
"Snotty nose stuck in a book again!" Violet would sneer.
Poppy embraced all genres, from revered classics to sensationalized penny dreadfuls. Her current favourite was the detective novel...dapper Hercule Poirot, in particular.
She read everything repeatedly and never ever questioned why she couldn't remember how any of the stories ended.
-------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/cripplegate.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------
Well, no - and neither do I. Such a smooth use of the prompts here.
DeleteIt's funny how you're sometimes reading along, and it hits you that you've read this book before. But it Poppy's case, there may be a bit more going on than cluttered memories. Really enjoyable read.
DeleteCornus Rosea
ReplyDeleteDo all babies cry all the time like she did? In that specially decorated room. Pink for a girl. Seersucker curtains and ridiculous bunny wallpaper. I didn't have to keep her, bring her home, but I did. And she wasn't one bit grateful.
Cried all the time.
I gave her every opportunity to mend her ways but she was a wilful child.
I buried her under the flowering dogwood tree.
Pink.
For a girl.
Insane but in a chilling way. What can I say about this? "We all go a little mad sometimes"
DeleteStuff of nightmares ... definitely not one to want to linger ...
DeleteSome kids just won't comply, so what is one to do with them? I'm not so sure about the solution I'm imagining in this tale. Nice, Patricia!
DeleteOoh, a little off-prompt treat to keep us awake at night. A really frightening telling of new motherhood.
DeleteChange of focus [278]
ReplyDeleteDog-tired; the residue of one night’s sex, the next spent in a cell, charged with murder, the hiatus in processing the crime scene gave DI Pettinger opportunity to nip home for a kip.
Sleep took its time: the morning’s Skype-enabled battering of heart and conscience; a new fear that Valdeta’s ridicule – ‘Your English devotion to duty’ – would undermine him in Aleks’ nine-year-old eyes...
Phone-woken: ‘Boss, they’ve got the body out. We’re thinking illegal immigrant –‘
‘On my way.’
He didn’t know her but, hosed down and naked, the tiny tattooed crown on her left buttock told him she was family.
I'm glad I'm not related to Pettinger. I wouldn't want a crown tattoo on my ass. The poor guy's really going through it.
Delete"Nip home for a kip." I LOVED that! Pettinger never fails to deliver a surprise or two which gets us re-evaluating all over again. Have I ever mentioned I've got something of a crush on that Pettinger? Probably so!
DeleteMore than wires crossed
ReplyDelete‘Dogging? Perverts having sex in cars and letting people watch? Leaving themselves open to ridicule – or worse?’
He shrugged. ‘Just thought I’d offer you the opportunity...’
How thoughtful of this fellow, eh?
Delete...and she didn't jump at that offer? What a prude.
DeleteI don't know if it's even possible to get a shorter piece that would deliver the same punch. I think probably not. As much as I had to chuckle at the tale itself, John's comment brought an additional snicker.
DeleteStill the Same
ReplyDeleteThe river hasn’t been this low for ages, yet negotiating the serpentine bank proved hazardous because the brush had grown extremely thick and clutching over time. I, however, doggedly persisted, for I couldn’t bypass this rare opportunity to see if everything is still the same.
When I reached the spot, I began shivering as memories of your incessant ridicule raged painfully through me. But I pulled myself together and ventured into the water. At mid-stream I smiled when I saw you beneath the rocks, your hair a weaving ribbon of gold deep in the current.
Everything is still the same.
and are you going to tell us how you did it? This is marvellously, immediately, and impressively ... er ... immersive
DeleteThe culprit always returns to the scene of the crime. Really well done, Jim. Very enjoyable.
DeleteImmensely vivid...and horrifically so. I can only imagine the state of the body having been in the water for so long. Nice use of "doggedly" and such an apt title. What an image is "ribbon of gold deep in the current."
DeleteSaying Goodbye
ReplyDeleteDawn broke over Kansas wheat, heralding the glory of Sirius, the dog star. He lay on a mattress of Fall chaff, staring. Would he gaze upon it next Winter when it ruled the night?
In hours he must leave, goodbyes said, tears wiped, opportunities lost. He trained for this. Fellow recruits, eyes wide, fearful, whispered night stories of fearsome Japanese soldiers. Of their bravery. Their cruelty. The sergeant huffed ridicule. “We will kill them all”.
Going to a strange place unknown to a farm boy. He’d heard rumors. An island. Guadalcanal.
He was a Marine. How bad could it be?
Anticipation in every word, impending fear and doon-laden. Horror without a doubt.
DeleteA young man going off to war... really well done. The part of the man wondering if he'd gaze upon the star next year was, after learning of his possible fate, very powerful.
DeleteWonderful little vignette. What a nicely tied-in "dog" prompt. One can only feel for these young men and women over the course of the years who have experienced similar thoughts and fears before facing what would become their ultimate fate. Those last two sentences do not bode for anything good to come out of this.
DeleteThis is excellent, Joe ... very poignant. A beautiful job of writing!
ReplyDeleteKursaal (Episode One Hundred Fifteen) - "Clowning Around"
ReplyDeleteCrow ceased ridiculing his sister for wanting to feed treats to his dogs at every opportunity. Sometimes, he hummed. Unheard of!
The about-face posed a conundrum until Arbuthnot Jester solved the mystery and decided to keep it to himself.
In a secluded area, Arby spotted his oldest sibling and the (normally morose) clown in flagrante. Arby was dumbfounded. Benny's taste ran to striking, firm-toned young gentlemen. Preferably blond. Crow met none of the criteria.
Perhaps Benny's standards had slipped. However, Arby was convinced someone had put his brother up to the liaison for a dare...or a lark.
But who?
---------------------------------------------------------
To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale, please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/kursaal.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------
NOTE: Crow and his sister, as well as the Jester Brothers (Arbuthnot/Arby and Benny) have all featured in previous episodes.
Patricia, this was so complete and so easy to follow. I admit I copied and pasted into a document to count the words. I thought for sure you must have went over. But you had one word to spare. Really nice.
DeleteHad to count the words, indeed. How could you doubt me, John? I am totally crushed!!!!!
DeleteThe Mad Italian 51.
ReplyDeleteThere is an opportunity right in front of the faces of the ‘servants of the people’ to be big-hearted and tear up all paperwork relating to the Windrush fiasco before they are all held to ridicule for their half-hearted efforts to score points off each other. Dog eat dog in the Houses of Parliament. The hapless helpless individuals who have made the UK their home now live in fear of their future. Is this right? Could it ever be right?
Of course not but the MPs are wilful and self-seeking, their importance before anyone else’s. On this situation, I despair.
As ever, the Italian puts the welfare of the people ahead of the powers that be. Hats off to him and all who follow in his beliefs.
DeleteSo much to enjoy and digest here. I love the "dog eat dog" reference and the use of "hapless helpless." I always devour the thoughts of the Italian with an eager appetite...even thought I'm not always conversant of the issue at hand.
DeleteBlogger is playing silly games with me tonight. I cannot 'reply' individually to any postings, it won't let me. And so... congrats, Jim, on winning last week, your writing just gets better. Congrats to everyone for entertaining me so much. I wanted to get busy and respond last night but a savage migraine crashed in... end of doing anything! So, apologies for no feedback this week, blame Blogger - being neurotic as ever. I will no doubt be able to comment tomorrow... if I'm lucky...
ReplyDeletePerfectly understandable, Antonia. Here's hoping you are totally well soon.
DeleteEven your explanations for not posting are entertaining... once a writer, always a writer. Feel better and good luck with Blogger.
DeleteI have to agree wholeheartedly with John on his observation about your entertaining Blogger issues post, Antonia. Indeed, if you' managed to work the prompt words into the account of your problems, it would have been a perfect stand-alone for the week.
DeletePromising Positions
ReplyDelete"Perfect earning opportunity for suitable individuals. Must be discreet. Displays of ridicule, derision or contempt will not be tolerated. Consensual domination, however, is encouraged. Proficiency in the art of bondage a plus, but training will be provided to likely applicants. Apply in person to The Doghouse and bring any references."
How very unsettling!
DeleteClever little advertising piece. You should have been in marketing... or maybe you are, but either way, good one.
ReplyDeleteI'm not (nor ever have been) in marketing, John, but am flattered at your comment. Upon reflection of the title, I do believe "(Com)Promising Positions" might have been a better fit. Wish I'd thought of it ahead of time!
DeleteThe Adventures of Rosebud, Pirate Princess #125
ReplyDeleteA Bookkeeper’s Journey
“I shall not expose myself to ridicule. I shall not give them ammunition or opportunity” Zehra said, picking up her suitcase. Her cat dogged her every step as she snuck out of her quarters. The moon peeked through the clouds, watching them. Through the night they walked, arriving in safety with the first streaks of dawn.
Always enigmatic with a unique beauty of words. I do hope this is posted early enough this week so more of our little group can enjoy.
DeleteJust a few words, every one of them blending with next beautifully. Nice, Rosie.
DeleteA new character with a new and different voice - and the cat dogging her every step had me searching for the prompt fat too long. .
Delete