... phrases from my first and my latest contribution to a
year’s-worth of Prediction. This might not be the fifty-second Prediction post
I’ve hosted, but this week’s words complete a twelvemonth.
I must raise my biggest glass to Antonia who has not
missed a single week to pen an episode of 'Infinity' – the Captain’s absorbing tale, nor –
which I see as an equally vital part of this site’s success – has she omitted
to comment on everyone else’s post.
Similarly Patricia who, since returning to the
challenge, has contributed comment and at least two and more often than not,
three pieces each week, building equally absorbing but different in character
serials. I thank you both, as I thank each and every other contributor who so
enriches my weekly reading.
For this, and for Antonia’s
‘Infinity 149’ and Patricia’s ‘Cripplegate
Junction 47’ I name both extra special joint winners this week.
And William, Rosie and Bill added their very individual
voices to the week’s delight.
Words for the
coming week are: canvas, feint, mate
Entries by
midnight Thursday 9th June, new
words and winners posted on Friday 10th
Revaluation [Threshold 116]
ReplyDeleteMy scowled annoyance as much a feint as his would-be smack of chastisement. Halted by realisation that what he’d delivered in my childhood was no longer appropriate, he breathed, ‘Oh, lass –‘, and thereby painted a faded canvas anew, in colours hoped unnoticed at the time.
And feared to admit now.
I’d been wild jealous of what my mother had with him. Tried every way to thwart their soul-mate exclusivity. Had sought someone to share such with me ever since.
Ravenscar the closest yet.
But now, impatient across the river, doubt-ridden, desires (if any) well-hidden, he become a sadly-lacking second.
there is a depth to this serial which is hard to define but it's there and this instalment confirms it.
DeleteThis was a reflective installment with some beautiful phrasing..."thereby painted a faded canvas anew" being but one amazing example. Hard to find the prompt words in such a well-written piece.
DeletePatricia, I think my use of canvas was a prime example of being creative with the prompts; making words work where they were never intended to - I always love it when that happens.
DeleteI love the delicate weaving of words in this piece. "thereby painted a faded canvas anew" being a fin example of this
DeleteSharing the top spot on the podium with Antonia. What an honour and totally unexpected given the high quality of last week's submissions. Thank you, Sandra.
ReplyDeletejumping in here to say I am well pleased to share the top spot with Patricia, who spends her time creating fully fledged characters in 100 words brilliantly. Thanks for the accolade!
DeleteI heard tonight that my book The Darker Side of Henry VIII, from Katherine to Katherine, Henry's queens reveal all has been accepted, will be out as an ebook by next Friday, and a paperback not long after. That means I have to get to work with the outstanding books, all six of them as well as compilation ones, and stop making excuses like doing the Richard III Foundation mailout... I can permit myself the time to write the Captain's journal, though!
Congratulations Antonia - and selfishly glad to know we'll not have to forfeit our weekly treat of the Captain.
DeleteFor some reason my congratulations to you both appear below somewhere, but just wanted to say it again, you are both very inspirational.
DeleteDeadly Sin
ReplyDeleteEvidence of unauthorized mating carried a mandatory death sentence. Only a few took the risk. Eli and Gracie were among that minute number.
The babe was a contended soul not given much to crying, which made keeping the secret easier. But officiants were relentless and despite feinting measures and promises of sealed lips, the hiding place was soon located.
Ignoring Eli's desperate appeals and Gracie's tearful apologies, the infant was bundled into a small canvas sack and taken away for immediate execution.
Oh! Oh, this is heart-rending. Skilfully told, making us care before slicing optimism from under us.
Deleteso cold, so... ordinary and horrific at the same time. Really cleverly crafted to hint at optimism and then comes the last line.
DeleteYou just pulled the plug out of my emotional bath tub.
Deletecanvas feint mate
ReplyDeleteChange of focus [182]
Four days before a firm lead.
‘Don’t like to dob up a mate –‘
Ben Brickwood: ‘He’s a friend?’
‘Nah, not exactly –‘
‘I’ll pop along for a chat. Where’s best?’
‘Gym. Above the Drum and Monkey.’
Not shiny lined machines, but spit and sawdust. Ropes and blood-stained canvas. Grunts and sniffs; fists pounding rather than the music.
Brickwood, instantly-known Law, inhaled deeply. A slender, well-muscled black youth tapped gloves to his sparring partner, feinted an uppercut then made his way over, grabbing a towel.
‘He’s a dark-room above my flat. Sleeps there some nights. Always takes a long shower.’
again, saying more than the 100 words permit, drawing pictures in the mind that will be hard to escape, such as the ropes and blood-stained canvas. Brilliant.
Deletepure prose poetry
DeleteSo easy to get totally lost in the atmosphere created with these words. I have to say, the information imparted, concise and brisk, would seem to demand more than 100 word requirement. "Drum and Monkey" reminds me of one of those tin toys where the little monkey rat-a-tats on a small drum until his clockwork wears down. Lovely imagery here.
DeleteThis is so subtle in it's perfection as Jk said pure prose.
DeleteKursaal (Episode Twenty Three) -- "Wally Leadbetter (Deceased)"
ReplyDeleteWally Leadbetter (dec.) was the original designer of The Argosy Experience, an elevated ride criss-crossing the park via overhead cables. Feinting left and right, the dangling boats provided a birdseye view of the Kursaal. A checkered canvas of attractions and amusements.
Each pier sported the cardboard cutout of a ship's mate, rumoured to bear a startling resemblance to Wally Leadbetter (dec.) himself, holding aloft the notification: "Closed For Renovations."
However, every seat of the perpetual people mover was always occupied. The passengers might have been mannequins if not for the fact that their mouths opened and closed in mindless chatter.
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To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale, please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/kursaal.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
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Wonderful setting up of the scene in the opening sentence, further illuminated, claiming reality, only for us to be totally disarmed by the last. You do this so well.
Deletewho invented Blogger, does anyone know? I want to go smash his skull in... it threw me out more times than I care to think of tonight, for no reason I can see!
DeleteOK, back to things in hand. Brilliant character depiction here and that killer last line - again!
The hairs on the back of neck went up with that last line.
DeleteCongratulations to both Antonia and Patricia for their joint win, fine tales from both. There's nothing better than the enjoyment of reading such fine writing, particularly when nestled by a log fire with a chilled glass of something. I have returned more than slightly mellow from my cottage holiday in Leek, I hope inspiration sparks early this week as I'm back to work tomorrow and covering for the big boss, as well as catching up on my own stuff.
ReplyDeleteCripplegate Junction/Part 48-Insanity Is Relative
ReplyDeleteClive Bailey battled nausea as the Station Master, feinting abruptly from side to side, rolled the trolley along the cramped passageway. Through an open door at the far end, Clive glimpsed the Cripplegate Asylum garden. It might have been the subject of a Monet canvas.
In the center of an immaculate lawn encircled by red and white rose bushes, two young ladies faced each other across an ornate chess board. Clive could not see them clearly, but their voices were inexplicably familiar.
"I believe that is checkmate, my dear!"
A scornful titter.
"On the contrary, sweet sister. It is stalemate!"
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To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale please visit:
http://www.novareinna.com/cripplegate.html
A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
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This painted in a slightly different style, and the prompts superbly merged. I especially enjoy the way you perfectly match adjectives: 'cramped', 'ornate' and 'scornful'.
ReplyDeleteI must admit, this particular installment fell beyond the normal style for Cripplegate and I was not entirely happy with that fact. However, the images refused to depart and barred me from coming up with a more "fitting" episode. I'm not entirely sure this scenario will be explored any further. Perhaps Marmalade can make a grand entrance and throw everything out of whack again! I'm pleased with the little vignette in general...just not convinced it belongs in the realm of Cripplegate. I apologize in advance for this off-kilter episode.
DeleteOh - I didn't mean it like that!
DeleteI read it - the view into the asylum garden - as other-worldly, intriguing and FAR from "unfitting" and had the choice of seeing it as part of Clive's displacement or an out-of-time corner of Cripplegate, in the way one catches glimpses into the gardens of old rectories (I remember that from a childhood in a Hertfordshire village.)
And sometimes these apparently off-road pieces presage a future direction, which you maybe just need to wait upon.
No. No. It wasn't a criticism of your comments at all, Sandra. Like I said, I wasn't completely happy with the "feel" to begin with and you were simply "voicing" my own thoughts. The scene will probably wander over to the back burner of Cripplegate, possibly to be brought back into play at some future time. It was actually very gratifying to note that Cripplegate's atmosphere is so distinctive that anything deviating from the norm was noticeable to others. Thank you.
DeleteI like the calmness (relative though it is) of this instalment and there are some interesting pathways to be explored from it. Keep it safe.
DeleteReading the other comments and your own observations, my view is that this adds further depth to the series in that it brings in a world beyond. I personally enjoyed it.
DeleteInvitation
ReplyDeleteUnexpected, his handwriting, for a man who applies paint with such full-bodied generous gestures to un-primed canvas to such devastating effect.
I’d’ve expected thrust and flow. Sharp-angled, spiky, black, smooth-bled from the gold nib of a top-range Papermate; same qualities, same concentrated energy he applied to sex.
So my first thought, on seeing blotched and stuttering cheap biro, scrawled round vowels, on paper torn from some exercise book (whose only merit its feint-linededness, rather than extra-wide) was that the invitation was a forgery. But I’ve been wrong before.
My last thought was I should learn to trust my instincts.
I read this a couple of times and then realized that the protagonist was in dire peril. This was a nicely disguised reveal. I blinked for a second and then....Oh dear lord, "last thought." I do so envy (and admire) your versatility. And continue to maintain there should be assigned weeks when someone other than yourself chooses the winner.
ReplyDeleteThank you Patricia, your kind words always very much appreciated ... and, in fact, your wish for someone other than me to choose will be granted in a couple of weeks or so
DeleteI'm delighted to hear that, but you won't be leaving us will you?
DeleteOnly for ~ten days, unavoidably incommunicado.
DeleteWell, at least it's not for good. (Thank heavens!)
DeleteOh, no - I'm too addicted!
DeleteBut - EARLY WARNING - next week's deadline will be Wednesday 15th, not Thursday
really nice little piece - saying a lot without saying a lot. Clever.
DeleteYou CAN'T go walkabout! not allowed!
Brilliantly set up piece that smacks us unexpectedly around the back of the head with it's conclusion. Chilling!
Deleteoh oh, struggling enough with a Thursday deadline, why do Thursdays come around so fast? Been too hot and not enough sleep, tis my excuse anyway.
ReplyDeleteI think the prompts this week were chosen just for the Captain. Here's our instalment for the week.
Infinity 150. This here cap’n has doubts First Mate believed the story, he might suspect a feint from me to set him off the scent. I can no do anything about that – now. But an order to load full canvas and set fast sail for the Indian Ocean diverted him for a while. That sea do often yield up enough merchantmen for even this here cap’n to be satisfied. Now I needs to find out what this is on board Infinity and how I keep that satisfied. Tis nothing but a pile of trouble, so it is and us all at sea.
Yes, Antonia, when it came up I thought it seemed near tailor-made, and what a nice making of it you've fashioned - I love that bell-tolling "now".
DeleteBut an early warning - deadline will be Wednesday next week (else I'll have to miss a week of writing Pettinger)
An excellent sculpting of the prompts into your piece Antonia. The intrigue is building to bursting point.
DeleteA Wednesday challenge next week, I shall move some things about which is no bad thing with the referendum coming up, I have a busy week that week, and I'm not a politician.
Absolutely marvellous installment. These prompt words were tailor-made for the Infinity serial, but putting them together in such an expert fashion....ah, 'tis another kettle o' sea bass altogether.
DeleteA bit greeting card like this week. Will do my best to come back and comment shortly if I can keep my eyes open, it's been a long day.
ReplyDeleteUnrequited
Declaring my love for you was no feint nor subterfuge,
no sleight of hand to unsettle and confuse.
I thought the ease with how we were, was fate.
Like I’d found my everlasting, my soul mate.
But.
Your bitter accusations of fraudulent emotion
quashed my belief of satisfied devotion
You tore up the happy picture that I’d painted with my heart.
So I took a brand new Canvas and made a brand new start.
Totally lovely in its observations. I like that this ended with a brand new canvas and so should all disastrous love affairs come to a conclusion. Amazed at the talent, but what else is new?
DeleteNot greetings card William, but a romance after the rose-tinted glasses have been removed and replaced with the stab of truth. I like the staccato of "Your bitter accusations of fraudulent emotion"
DeleteLittle Martyn 1665 - Part 1
ReplyDeleteJohn Brindle undid the canvas bag from London with fetid excitement. The villagers thought that he bought only fine cloth from London, but this was a feint. A provincial tailor needed the patterns from used clothes to update his styles, and with the plague creating devastation in the capital
his old mate Jeremiah could get his hands on some of the latest and finest fashions.
The new dresses were indeed intricate and fine, soon Brindles would boast gowns finer than those found in Chesterfield and Derby. The cloth though, that made his skin itch.
Oooohhhh. Dare we hope that this intriguing glimpse into historical London might be just the beginning of an entire new pathway for us to follow? I do hope so because this opening portion lends itself to a magnificent storyline.
DeleteEchoing Patricia's excitement at the idea of another serial to become addicted to, even more intriguing because I'm in the midst of writing a short story set in 1666.
DeleteAnd this is full of promise.
The Adventures of Rosebud, Pirate Princess #28
ReplyDeleteMy Friend Cecily
I went camping once, long before I met Natasha. My mother sewed me a little canvas tent and let me go off into our backyard forest. My best friend came with me. She was a shimmery blue dragon. She taught me how to fence and when to feint and dodge to escape my opponents. We were going to be first mates on each other’s pirate ships.
Stupid knights.
This was truly lovely both in imagery and the depiction of childhood daydreams. The words come together in an almost poetic manner.
DeletePatricia has taken the words right out of my mouth - lovely indeed. Feather-light prose.
Delete