Friday 26 May 2017

The rain in Spain ...

... will, I hope, confine itself to the plain next week and avoid where I’ll be staying, so it will be another week where I ask each of you to name your favourite entry; the one you consider to be the week’s winner.

Goodness knows this week has been hard to judge – so many inventive uses of the prompt words plus some forgotten songs planted in my head – and as ever I appreciate the efforts made to comment.
‘Visual’ was an oft-repeated word, scene-setting something everyone excels in – Zaiure’s  a lesson in creating intimacy in tiny detail – but tops for me this week was Jk’s ‘Gostegodd 006’, closely followed by Antonia’s ‘Musing over lunch’.

Words for next week: contempt shoelace trivial

Entries by midnight Thursday 1st June, new words posted on Friday 2nd


Usual rules: 100 words maximum (excluding title) of flash fiction or poetry using all of the three words above in the genres of horror, fantasy, science fiction or noir. Serialised fiction is, as always, welcome. All variants and use of the words and stems are fine. Feel free to post links to your stories on Twitter or Facebook or whichever social media you prefer.

102 comments:

  1. Many congratulations to JK and Antonia for last week's top honours. How Sandra manages to call it from so many fine entries week after week is totally beyond my comprehension.

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    1. Yes, lots of good stories last week. Great reading.

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    2. Congratulations JK and thanks, Sandra! will see what I can do with this week's highly varied words... currently doing a swift read-through edit of 10 books, then writing the blurb, so time is tight. I am also working on a blog for the shop... there's fun!

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    3. Hats off to JK and Antonia for their submissions

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    4. thank you all! Late to the party this week, off to read and comment now I posted!

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  2. Who Let the Cats Out?

    The last she knew, her new boyfriend was a shoelace salesman with a penchant for Christian based Trivia Pursuit. What was he doing here? Their eyes met and her face flushed.

    “Bree?”

    “Oh, hi Greely.”

    “I hardly recognized you in that teddy.”

    “I see you’re wearing loafers.” She was going for contempt.

    “What’s the going rate these days?”

    “What’s the population of Jerusalem?”

    “What?”

    “I thought so,” she said.

    “So, now that the cat’s out…?”

    “Yes, it is a little sticky, this.”

    “Half price?” Greely said.

    “Of course.” She took his arm and ushered him into a room.


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    1. Sly and clever, hinting rather than hammering facts home. I like it.

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    2. Accepting reality vs. the potential falseness of learning for a new couple. I enjoyed this story. Light, but not airy

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    3. And a perfect title! Sly is right, and loafers! what was he thinking!?

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    4. This was wonderfully put together. I loved those little half-hints and unanswered questions. Great dialogue.

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    5. Great back and forth dialogue with just enough left to the imagination.

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  3. Ways And Means

    The questionnaire is deemed trivial. Of minimal consequence but nonetheless necessary. Those beneath contempt have already been deprived of shoelaces, belts, ballpoint pens and the like. Thus, suicide has been erased from the equation.

    No matter. The end result will be the same.

    The options are varied. Not necessarily an easy decision: noose; toxic cloud; speeding bullet; lethal cocktail. To name but a few.

    Tick the box.

    Executioner's choice.

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    1. A grim inevitability to this. Love the use of shoelaces.

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    2. Instead of a last meal, you chose the method of your death. I like that.

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    3. anyone who hangs themselves with their shoelaces shows an epic amount of fortitude.

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    4. I'll have a lethal cocktail if it's as sharp as this :)

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    5. Fascinating idea of a questionnaire bringing or suggesting a choice at the end. Powerful final line.

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    6. I love twisted alternative thinking and that's good twisted alternative thinking...

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  4. Congrats Jk! Loved that piece. :)

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    1. Cheers Zaiure! Sometimes the words fit the Gostegodd universe smoothly and sometimes I just can't force them in there :(

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    2. It can definitely be tricky at times to continue a serial. :)

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  5. Change of focus [237]

    ‘Aleks’ safety only probable? I need more than–‘
    ‘Shoulda thought of that before leaving him behind–‘ Bekim’s contempt palpable.
    ‘Bollocking hell – I didn’t leave for some trivial reason–‘
    ‘You hot-shit polis solving murder, right?’
    ‘Right–‘
    ‘You promised Elinka your support–’
    Elinka. Widow of his eldest brother. Wed when too young to even manage her own shoelaces. Her son now occupying the Khakbethian throne.
    ‘Come fetch Aleks. Take Elinka’s daughter for Aleks’ care. Take two sons to learn policing–’
    ‘Not possible–‘ But Pettinger knew it had to be. ‘Valdeta?’
    ‘I take care of her.’

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    1. Pettinger reminds me of a detective version of Henry Clay. Nicely written with good prompt use.

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    2. the plot thickens... moving people like pawns, very clever

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    3. This intriguing installment provides even more insight into this wonderful cast of characters. Had to chuckle at "Bollocking hell" and had an instant picture of the Sex Pistols' sole studio album. I continue to fear for Aleks though.

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    4. Rapid-fire dialogue that continues to entice and entangle the reader and the characters.

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    5. another great instalment with vivid imagery.

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  6. Not the food of love [Threshold 164]

    ‘Not ill-intentioned?’
    ‘Not by their reckoning.‘ A smile, narrow as a shoelace twisted across Raven’s face, ‘– but I’ve a strong dislike of the evangelical. Not to mention hypocrisy.‘ Amusement at the rag-rag band turned contemptuous.
    Bewildered, more at the speed of the churchmen’s arrival than the narrow-minded triviality of their complaint, ‘But we’ve – and how will music stop us?’
    Bitterly, ‘It’s not sex they condemn. It’s space –’
    ‘They’re saying we’re too large?’
    Another snort. ‘Rooms. Having sacked the staff there’s no longer one occupant for every bedroom, even though my grandmother always crammed them all in the basement.’

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    1. narrow as a shoelace, excellent use of that word. Well, they could always open up as a B&B, call it The Lupine View.

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    2. I too loved the shoelace grin :)

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    3. Magnificent use of the prompts and, as already noted, a smile "narrow as a shoelace" is probably the most inventive implementation of the word this week.

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    4. I also loved the phrase 'smile, narrow as a shoelace', as well as 'narrow-minded triviality'.

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    5. another superb instalment. Keep them coming... we need to know the conclusion to this saga!

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  7. Kursaal (Episode Seventy Two) -- "Raggle Taggle"

    The didicoy waited for Mrs. Pepperdyne to open the door. She regarded them with contempt. Ne'er-do-well gypsies! Still, given threat of the evil eye, it was probably prudent to make a purchase.

    The woman's basket overflowed with trivial items. Clothes pegs, shoelaces, sprigs of heather, lavender and the like. The man appeared to be present merely for protection. He said nothing and stared into the distance.

    Little Libby chose a beaded barrette from the woman's pannier. Her mother paid the asking price before firmly closing the door.

    Cobbles and Crow took their own sweet time leaving the premises.

    ---------------------------------------------------------
    To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale, please visit:
    http://www.novareinna.com/kursaal.html
    A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
    ---------------------------------------------------------


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    1. A too-familiar scene, redolent with your trademark subtle menace

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    2. Description and scene setting, very well done, melted in prompts and hint of spice.

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    3. wonderful stirring of unease

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    4. Loved how the emotions of each character came through so sharply. I also learned a new word - didicoy! :)

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    5. didicoy was used a lot when I was much younger, almost gone out of general use now, nice to see someone using it. This is an outstanding episode, loved it.

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  8. Cripplegate Junction/Part 98-Gone But Not Forgotten

    Contemptuous of humankind in principle, Marmalade occasionally made exceptions. One was Miss Constance. Her parasol sheltered him from showers (he loathed getting wet) and she ensured the shoelaces he played with were minus dangerous metal aglets.

    When he found her, countenance melancholy, in the Canteen, the feline sensed Constance mourned the disappearance of her brother George. He empathized. Some time ago, his own littermates had also vanished without a trace.

    Violet hummed to a trivial ditty on the radio as she went about her duties. Marmalade's green eyes narrowed with animosity.

    The waitress was certainly NOT one of his exceptions.

    --------------------------------------------------------
    To read the earlier installments (a suggestion only) which led to this point in the tale please visit:
    http://www.novareinna.com/cripplegate.html
    A link to return to "The Prediction" can be found on the site. Thank you.
    ---------------------------------------------------------

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    1. An episode starring Marmalade - you cannot go wrong. And, of course, cats always are contemptuous. And trivial ditty lovely.

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    2. How well you humanize Marmalade is awesome. This excerpt is as good as I've read in this series. Marmalade empathizes with Constance.

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    3. Love Marmalade's eyes narrowing as h passes judgement on the world

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    4. I love Marmalade, and this scene is a favorite. His declared favor and dislike feels very catlike, and I love the description of what Constance does for him.

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    5. absolutely perfect cat behaviour in every way. I see both my cats in Marmalade and here he excels in his contemptuous dismissal of most of the human race. My two dislike everyone other than us, because we feed them... and like last night, tried to sleep while he slept with all four legs straight out and the paws under my pillow... the things we let them do...

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  9. Above the law

    ‘”Civil contempt”? That’s an oxymoron if ever I heard one!’
    ‘Yeah, especially as I’m always polite. Remember me pleases and thank-yous. Even as she’s pushing her tongue far enough down me throat to choke me –‘
    ‘You could just say ”No”!’
    ‘You try denying her! Two minutes after I get through the door she’s on her knees, one hand on me zip, the other undoing me shoelaces.’
    ‘My heart bleeds. No trivial matter shagging a High Court Judge –‘
    ‘Not when I got caught. Which is why her husband won’t publicly accuse me.’
    ‘And is insisting on pistols at dawn.’

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    1. Interesting that the subject of a duel of honor might not actually be about the woman but the man. Very good use of prompts, along with setting the scene.A really very good story.

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    2. Absolutely lovely. The described suggestions were just sufficiently subtle to hint at something much more. Your talent at this type of tale is unsurpassed...but I believe I've voiced that before.

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    3. I like this a lot, so much wrapped up in the few words - again.

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    4. An excellent use of dialogue to set an entire scene. Loved the two voices.

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  10. Kandar 12: Maybe a Price to Pay

    “The problem with magic; it does exactly what the caster wanted it to do…so no one can steal from the tower. You will not be stealing; you’ll be delivering.”
    “I’m not stealing, yet you need me to break in? Forgive my contempt.”
    “My nocturnal specialist, magic I handle, guards are your specialty. What would you charge?”
    “A trivial sum for a mage, restore Philus’s arm, 1000 high silver stags, a map to Kadget’s tomb, and a new pair of shoelaces. Mud is not their friend.”
    “Do you want to know what you’ll be delivering?”
    “Nope. You’ll know in two days.”

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    1. I like the inclusion of seemingly prosaic shoelaces in the list of more esoteric rewards

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    2. Nice hint of mystery there at the end. I love that magic "does exactly what the caster wanted it to do..." True enough until a spell goes badly awry. LOL.

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    3. I enjoyed the list of rewards, and agree with Jk, that the inclusion of shoelaces was pretty great. :)

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  11. A good way to improve my poetry is to write more.

    Times Backward Slide

    Tock-tick, tock-tick, goes the backwards clock.
    The mice slide down the clock, shoelaces between their mouths.
    Rules don’t apply to backwards time.
    The day ends before it begins
    so does love mimic the day or follow the sun?
    Are wounds no longer healed by time?
    Two by land, one by sea,
    Now the call for his afternoon ride?
    Broken hearts and inquisitions,
    Juliet pursues Romeo, Sampson clips Delila.
    Outrageous fortune is now an oxymoron,
    Slings and arrows still aren’t.
    Broken bones from sticks and stones,
    Hopefully time heals all wounds,
    except bruises, deep and hidden.
    Those are painful beyond belief.

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    1. outrageous fortune really is an oxymoron :D

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    2. You have incorporated many well-known turns of phrase here. I liked many of them. My favourite is probably that "Rules don't apply to backwards time." Much to ponder on there.

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    3. Patricia called out my favorite phrase as well. Enjoyed considering a reversal of two well-known stories with Juliet and Delila.

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  12. "Is there such a thing as an evil seed," the news commentator asked on the television as Jeffery's sister scooched down to where he was seated on the couch kicking his legs. She sighed frustrated with the thinly veiled contempt of an older sibling as she attempted to help him tie his shoe laces for the eighth time.
    He squirmed against the trivial contact, unable to stand it.
    Thus engaged in her task, the older girl never saw the knife coming.

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    1. Younger siblings are very likely evil seeds ;) Poor older sister!

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    2. Nice one. Sufficiently nasty while still being short and ... ahem ... to the point. Good usage of the prompt words which blended perfectly into the plot of the tale.

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    3. just the kind of nasty little piece I love. Thanks for that good read.

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    4. Creepy and dark. Clever with the foreshadowing of the news report.

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  13. Ghostrunner, I need to ask because I don't know. Is your comment that I made a mistake because it IS an oxymoron or that you liked the line? Also, internet isn't my second language but I think :D -happy

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  14. This came to me on the way home last night.

    Symposium II

    “Those hypocrites,” said Dr. F.
    “How so,” replied Dr. M.
    “They use created electricity. I used all natural lightning and they destroyed my home.”
    “I see their contempt, feel their loathing. They use artificially grown animal organs. I went to the source, no band-aid for me. Those hacks.”
    “I’m surprised they don’t use shoelaces as suture.”
    “You know what, Dr. F?”
    “What?”
    “They actually honor us. It might be trivial, but they follow down our path, yet seek to relegate us to fiction, so nobody knows.”
    “You might have something. We live in their actions, don’t we Dr. M.”

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    1. I have a feeling that "Dr. F" and "Dr. M" are characters that should be known to me. I believe "Dr. F" may be Frankenstein. As always, your dialogue show talent in that area. Nice one, Jeffrey.

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    2. your dialogue is improving, Jeffrey, week by week. Keep it going.

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    3. It is fun to decide what the initials stand for. :) Clever idea of 'shoelaces as suture'.

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    4. For those curious, back in January, I posted Symposium, same two participants.
      Also, thanks very much for your comments.

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  15. Chasing the Duff-Anddum prize

    He was obviously aiming for louche, but missed by a country mile. Mustard yellow cheesecloth trousers, of all things. A greying ginger beard.
    “Of course, I am a literary writer,” he opined. “I trample on conventions, and contemptuous is my middle name. Literary prizes, however, trivialise my art and my message. Always chasing the next big idea, and ignoring the travails of ordinary middle class poets in favour of some parvenu from Guatemala, or some such…”

    He wheezed as his speech flailed to a strangulated end.
    No ordinary judge, I. The shoelace thick cheesewire my comment on his latest novella.

    (99 words excluding title)

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    1. This was such a lesson in the art of being presumptuous and I adore the idea of a "strangulated end." How deliciously clever!

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    2. Lots of lovely phrasing and imagery - 'greying ginger beard', 'wheezed as his speech flailed to a strangulated end', and of course the ending.

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  16. Your title is a nicely placed pun. Area all writers literary, so another pun. Nicely placed and woven humor and prompts.

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    1. oh the temptation... I attended a signing session by an island writer. She was 'normal', those who clustered were not, all considering themselves 'literary' writers and boasting about having an agent... a shoelace thick cheesewire would have been wonderful that night. Thanks, I can have happy visions of doing just that now!!

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  17. As the Chips Fall

    The shoelace saved her.

    Cursing, Lovelace ducked down to retie her shoe, then fell forward onto her palms with a cry, as something whizzed through the air overhead and showered her with chipped stone from the wall in front of her. She scuttled sideways, eyes wide, chest heaving, mind whirring frantically to identify the threat. Someone was shooting at her?

    It had all seemed so trivial. Take the bag. Drop it off. Make some cash. But then Roberta had suggested drinks and dancing, and she’d forgotten all about it. All about the man with the contemptuous eyes, and his warning.

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    1. Loved how the little details were drizzled to us like the icing on a currant bun. This surely MUST have a continuation.

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  18. I liked how you transitioned from nonchalant to being shot at so easily and quickly. Impressive prompt use and an enjoyable story.

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    1. very smoothly done and leaving us wanting more.

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  19. Leonardo musing, I think!!
    The Mad Italian no 7

    I asked a question, I have thought long on the answer I hoped to see – but didn’t. I hoped you would say ‘but surely others would have contrived to come up with solutions to problems, just as you did, great Leonardo’ and I could have knocked it down with contempt, for there were no minds outside of ours then and certainly few since that had the ability to create what we created. Everyone else seemed to go for the trivial, what I call shoelace thinking. Narrow, goes through holes but has no function but to hold a shoe in place.

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    1. Enjoyable and for me applicable. The quickest, sometimes easiest answer is the most accepted. A simple answer doesn't always mean a simple question.

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    2. "Shoelace thinking" is surely the most innovative use of the prompt word this week. And I do love Leonardo's musings.

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    3. Loved this look into his mind! And I agree with Patricia that 'shoelace thinking' was very clever.

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  20. Shoelace thoughts:
    The first shoelace said to the second, just how trivial is our life?
    The second one responded with contempt. Without us the inhabitants of the world would struggle to keep their shoes on their feet and then where would they be?
    The first shoelace said, walking without shoes, letting their feet feel the softness of rainwater, the touch of grass, the sharp heat of paving slabs in summer – how good is that?
    The second shoelace said, what would become of us?
    The first shoelace said are you not tired of being choked to death every day?
    They rebelled. They snapped.

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    1. Excellent. For me, in college they became key chains. Philosophical humor, I adore this.

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    2. I simply love this little piece. How very creative...two shoelaces having a conversation. Your stand-alone submissions are always something to be looked forward to, and you never fail to provide us with the best.

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    3. A lovely, thought-provoking discussion. Loved how they rebel at the end.

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  21. I really need to keep better track of the weekdays.

    The Adventures of Rosebud, Pirate Princess #79
    Common Sense?


    The arrogance of these people! I understand that they’re the most powerful of the Storm Lords, but still! I’m the eldest princess of my mother’s kingdom, not a trivial toddler. They will never rule. There’s a saying about burning useful things-shoelaces? no, bridges. And influential cupcakes? In any case treating me with contempt is not the best plan. I wonder if Henry would steal their hats for me.

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    1. Another very good late entry. Influential cupcakes is a beautiful line.
      I can easily visualize her pacing in a waiting parlor. Well done.

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    2. Whimsical as always and enchantingly written as usual. I only wish you could get these in a little earlier so more people could enjoy Rosebud's adventures. I almost missed this but decided to make one more drive-by before the deadline hit.

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    3. She is such a fun, interesting character. Love the ideas conjured by 'storm lords' and she does not seem like someone to annoy. :)

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  22. quick comment, my vote this week goes to Patricia's ice cold Ways and Means.

    Rosie, lovely piece, this!

    Everyone, thanks for the comments on the shoelace discussion, I have absolutely no idea where it came from!

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  23. It's very difficult to vote so I'm picking 3!
    1. Sandra's Threshold for the shoelace grin
    2. Patricia's Cripple gate Junction for the marvellously disdainful Marmalade
    3. John's Who let the cats out for the sly humour and great visuals

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  24. For its sheer creativity, my vote goes to Antonia's "Shoelace Thoughts," followed very closely by Johns's "Who Let The Cats Out?" Ye gods, this was a difficult choice...I could have picked at least another five!

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  25. Patricia's Ways and Means, closely followed by John's superb piece.

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  26. Very tough, more like splitting hairs, than shoelaces.
    Sandra's Not the Food of Love.

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  27. Always hard to choose! Patricia's Ways & Means, will be my choice.

    Forgot I didn't post my pick. Apologies!

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