Friday 3 July 2015

Week of heat and drama

STOP PRESS:  Submissions of novel-length SFF required by Hodderscape during August

And, forgive me, I’m well aware this week’s UK max temperature, maybe since records began, is not a patch on other places, including Greece, from where Fergus has delivered  three fascinating episodes, the first of which wins my vote for first place this week:  the stark, staccato delivery adds to the impact of the cold-hearted tale.  In joint second place come Colleen and Rebecca, whose writing never fails to enthral and whose Nate and Seth serial has ever been mouth-wateringly delicious. As Tim says, its a never-ending delight to see the variations wrought by each of you from the prompts
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For this coming week the words are: hawk,  tape,  legacy

Entries by midnight Thursday 9th July, at which time I shall be en route to Seattle.
New words will be posted on Friday 10th July and winners as soon as I am able thereafter.  Apologies in advance for possible brevity or lack of comment from me; I trust each of you will make up for it.
Usual rules: 100 words maximum (excluding title) of flash fiction or poetry using all of the three words above in the genres of horror, fantasy, science fiction or noir. Serialized fiction is, as always, welcome. All variants and use of the words and stems are fine. Feel free to post links to your stories on Twitter or Facebook or whichever social media best pleases you and, if you like, remind your friends that we are open to new and returning writers.

50 comments:

  1. For the record - I've no idea what prompt words are coming up before I post them so this was pdq inspiration rather than rehearsal!

    A change of focus [134]

    Pettinger’s father’s identity seemed doomed to permanent uncertainty. Unlike that of his mother. Her failure to drown him he recalled as he learned – from the hawk-nosed, hood-eyed Raptor – she’d subsequently succeeded with three would-be sisters.
    On that occasion – a layby beside a fast road to the docks – Raptor, with the plausibility of a brain-invading tapeworm, had then claimed to be his father. Claimed his killing Pettinger’s mother merciful. Lied in denying he’d done the same for Pettinger’s eldest brother.
    Details of Raptor’s death – at the surprising hands of Vanessa – and secret burial unlikely to be known by Vladlina.
    Weren’t they?

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    1. Powerful first line; poor Pettinger! I've always loved Raptor's description.

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    2. death and destruction, standard Pettinger fare delivered as always in your outstanding style!

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    3. Pettinger's highly dysfunctional family - and other relationships - are endlessly fascinating. You always leave me wanting more.

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  2. Thank you so much, Sandra. Congrats to Colleen and Rebecca too! This comes as a great surprise. My first win at anything literary. Things here have been quite crazy over the past few days and Prediction is one of these things that keep me sane (at least I think I'm sane...)! Thanks again.

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    Replies
    1. Congratulations Ferg, Colleen and Rebecca, well done.

      Newbie

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  3. Tasos Papadopoulos, his whirling moustach and black waistcoat reeking of cheap cologne, opened his enormous mouth. Gold teeth gleamed from the back rows as he hawked the second hand junk from his stall in the Plaka flea market. Boxes full of candle holders, statuettes, broken radios, cassette tapes, wrist watches, ancient cameras and battered brass plates stood regimented before him.
    ‘Fifty drachmas a piece!’ he cried.
    He hadn’t seen the begger child dipping into the box of old letters.
    ‘How much for this?’ asked the boy.
    ‘Fifty drachmas,’ answered Tasos glibly.
    The poor boy left Onasis’s legacy in the box.

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    1. Oh - the family historian in me weeps, but the writer is delighted with the colour and movement in this. And will we hear more about the letters?

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    2. Loved how packed this was with interesting and colorful curio, and I loved the excellent description of Tasos.

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    3. congrats! sorry it's late, been a frantic week. Good one, this, looking for more of the story.

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    4. Lots of intrigue and a great set up for more, yet it stands alone well as the story of a moment of possibility and loss.

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  4. What goes around [Threshold 71]

    This legacy – a world gone mad then bad – the result of generations before us blindly believing when doves exceed hawks by such and such proportion, they’ll be a force for peace. Forgetting doves no less prone to corruption (just self-deceiving coy). The war-like do their fighting openly. As these had done.
    ‘Is it Maria’s people who are killed?’
    ‘Maria’s people killed these. That’s why so few.’
    When I could bear to look, just five. All old. Strip-flayed head-to-toe, like tapes around a maypole.
    ‘They left the strong. Misdirected their revenge.’ Ravenscar twitchy-alert as his horse. ‘And here they come. Ride!

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    1. I do like this Threshold serial, always something startling coming out in each episode. For this one, I loved the 'twitchy-alert as his horse.' Great description.

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    2. Oh wow! So much dreadful observation and action in one short episode! The war-like do their fighting openly. was perfectly placed and said so much.

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    3. Very lovely descriptions throughout. Loved 'blindly believing when doves exceed hawks...they'll be a force for peace' and 'the war-like do their fighting openly'.

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  5. Same Old Song and Dance

    Coming back had been …turbulent, at best. The music had changed on the way down, from piano to something like a wheezy organ. It played the same phrase over and again, like a tape loop. There’d been a voice beneath it, shouting like a carnival hawker, and it had pissed me off.

    I forgot to tell Seth about it when he mentioned that someone was trying to kill us.

    “Oh goody, something new and different for us."

    He hauled me off the floor, shrugging in resignation. “Don’t look now, Nate, but I’m beginning to think that’s our legacy. Let’s go.”

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    Replies
    1. "He hauled me off the floor, shrugging in resignation" - this the hallmark of your writing - tight, accurate verbs - excellent..

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    2. The Break (4)

      The sharp shriek of a hawk cut through the roar of the sea. It disappeared into the back of the arch, so I followed it into a ginormous echoey cave. I was so pissed off with dad, I started crying, but the noise was funny. I shouted and my voice came back. ‘HELLO Hello hello hello’ tapering to nothing, then ‘Who the hell are you?’ but no echo, only it wasnt my voice. I ran out and dad was there. He held me tight. ‘Your mother gave you a terrible legacy’, he said. ‘I believe you, my beautiful girl.'

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    3. Nice voice! In both senses.

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    4. As Ferg says, nice voice indeed - I am enjoying this serial.

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    5. congratulations Colleen and Rebecca, again, sorry for the delay. This box refused to come up under your entry, so just saying, brilliant, more please...

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    6. Mashie, class instalment this.

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    7. Colleen: You always give me the best openings and remind me of Nate's unique take on things.

      Mashie: I am really enjoying this story and found myself relieved that her dad finally believes her.

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    8. Colleen: I always enjoy Nate's narration and the blend of humor, action and suspense. Lots of great lines.

      Mashie: Definitely happy her father believes her and it opens up the story for lots more to come. :)

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  6. Elluria

    Flipping mint green hair out of her heat-flushed face, Elluria fixed hawkish eyes on the man blocking the door. She could feel the floor vibrating from hundreds of feet, and hear the frenzied clamor of voices calling her name. Exhilaration flared like wildfire in her belly, and set her taped fingers tingling.

    “I gotta get out there,” she said. She flicked her lip ring impatiently, and hefted her guitar.

    This is what you’ve done with Naariel’s Legacy?” His eyes glowed like fire-lit rubies. “Squandering your years in backwoods bars?”

    Elluria’s body stilled, sharpened. “Run along, little boy,” she snarled.

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    Replies
    1. This is so complete - a mini, gem-like novel.

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    2. agree with Sandra, there is a complete-ness about this, if you see what I mean. I just turned down a 5213 word story which rambled and went nowhere. They should see the class 100 word stories we have here!

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    3. I could see this whole thing in gorgeous, vibrant color. I want more, yet it is perfect alone. I wish I knew how you do that!

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  7. Congrats Fergus, Colleen and Rebecca!

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  8. Roasting the two sausages she'd found in the trash behind the King George Hotel, Melpomene was glad to have something to feed her son at last.
    'Mama, Mr. Tasos shoed me away from his stall again this morning.'
    'He did, did he?'
    Fortified for the first time in weeks, Melpomene swooped like a hawk from the clear blue skies above Plaka, her claws sinking deep into the junk vendor’s flesh. He kicked and screamed as he was plucked into the air. A tourist taped the whole thing and sold it to the BBC, such was the legacy of Tasos Papadopoulos.

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    Replies
    1. You capture the sense f place so very well, Fergus

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    2. Oh, wow. Now I must know what she is and where this is going!

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    3. Loved the surprise when Melpomene swooped down from the sky; wasn't expecting that! I also love her name. :)

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  9. highly apposite and strangely satisfying - bit of mythology meeting modern times. Like.

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  10. Everything happened so quickly. The video tape was blurry and as soon as the tourist had turned his camera skyward the automatic contrast control whited out the whole image. But looking up, the tourist failed to see the boy fishing in the boxes for the letter about the Onasis Legacy.
    The urchin darted through the narrow lanes with the yellowing envelope clasped in his tiny hand.
    At last, in a quiet corner, he opened it up and read it.
    All typewritten and correct.
    On the back there was a handwritten message.
    Find Hawk. it said.
    Who the hell is Hawk?

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    Replies
    1. Enjoying the continuation of the story. Each piece ends with me wanting to learn more. :)

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  11. ‘We’ve found the boy.’
    Hawk looked up. ‘Did he have it?’
    ‘He says he doesn’t know anything about any letter.’
    Hawk pushed the play button and the quarter inch tape slid smoothly between the bobbins of the Tascam. An old Rembetiko song began to seep from the broken loud speaker sitting beside his armchair.
    ‘Was he singing this?’
    All three of them listened.

    ‘I won’t live on my knees,
    I am the son of the Hawk,
    So what if my wounds open?
    I can withstand the falmes,
    Mother, don’t pitty me, Mother, don’t cry for me.’

    ‘That’s his real legacy.’

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  12. Apologies to Kostas Virvos, for the poor translation of his 'Son of the Hawk'

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  13. https://youtu.be/a-xDLAM847o

    Stelios Kazantzidis singing Son of the Hawk. (tis yerakinas yios)

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  14. good one, Fergus! enjoyed the read.

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  15. Infinity 104
    The Creature be a legacy of a deal done with an islander somewhere on some godforsaken island. He called himself Hawk, fool name for a fool man, I thought at the time. Now I knows better. Now I know he had me taped from the start, I be the fool, I bought the artifact wanting luck for the Infinity, its cap’n and crew and bought the Creature along with it. Nothing comes without a high price. Damned if this price ain’t just a tad too high right now.
    We sold the spice. We bought the grog. Tis enough for now.

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    1. At last we find out how the Creature came to bedevil the captain! I never tire of this grand, dark adventure.

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    2. This such a meaty, pivotal episode, Antonia, I had to come back ad re-read -excellent.

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    3. Enjoyed hearing about the Creature's origins!

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  16. Really great voice. Used to be a pastafarian myself once.

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  17. Thick as a Brick

    No sleep, fast food, and the smell of industrial cleaner Nate had employed on the previously blood-spattered dashboard had me hating the car’s interior. Classic rock tapes – the legacy of his misspent youth in constant rotation – were not helping.

    “It occurs to me you’re a lot stronger now,” Nate said casually.

    I twitched like a mouse mid-field with a hawk dropping fast. “Little bit, yeah.”

    “Did you take my blood from the car?”

    “No.”

    “So the smear on your fingers was from when I was out.”

    I always forget how well he can punch and drive at the same time.

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    Replies
    1. Having driven yesterday with hire-car loaded rock classics this really impacted. And so, so good as a whole.

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    2. You always manage to paint such vivid, real scenes. Loved the rock music and the line 'I twitched like a mouse mid-field..."

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